Recent Posts

6/19…Suicide, Religion/Spirituality, and the Philosophy of Absurdism; Albert Camus, and the Myth of Sisyphus (found in Yoga/Philosophy and Awareness)

—-…acknowledging the truth of the situation will conquer it, and in the story of Sisyphus, just like the absurd man, keeps pushing. When Sisyphus acknowledges the futility of his task and the certainty of his fate, he is freed to realize the absurdity of his situation and to reach a state of contented acceptance. “All is well,” indeed, and “one must imagine Sisyphus happy.”…

Absurdism is the embracing and acceptance of the Absurd. It encourages the individual to live defiantly and authentically in spite of the psychological tension of the absurd. By embracing all the unreasonableness the world has to offer there is scale of values and what counts is not the best living but the most living! By accepting the Absurd, one can achieve the greatest extent of one’s freedom. If the absurd experience is truly the realization that the universe is fundamentally devoid of absolutes, then we as individuals are truly free. By recognizing no religious, spiritual, or other moral constraints, and by revolting against the Absurd (through establishing our own meaning-making) while simultaneously accepting it as absurd, one can more likely find contentment through the personal meaning constructed in the process. It is all about the process within the gradual search for what makes us happy and develops meaning. Clearly no ethical rules apply as they are all based on higher powers or on justification. “Integrity has no need of rules and everything is permitted is not an outburst of joy, but rather a bitter acknowledgment of a fact.” The image that comes to my mind with all of this is one of a joker or of the Mad Hatter from Alice in Wonderland. Standing for things obsessively and desperately one minute but then laughing madly at ourselves and others and talking nonsense about whatever it is we’re choosing to stand for and establishing meaning to, in the next. “It’s all absurd, It’s all absurd!” I seem to dance around ecstatically laughing and saying maniacally in my head.


5/19…Blade Runner Philosophy; More Human Than Human (found in Save Me From Technology)

—-What happens if you’ve been implanted with the memories and life experiences of another? Does that change your reality if you knew or didn’t know?  Rachael has been given a source for her existence and ego, vs all the rest of us humans who have not, but still have an ego, yet, we obsessively come up with theories, ideals, religions, philosophies for needing to know the ‘what’ and ‘why’ for making sense of whatever that source is.  We think and struggle with the idea that we are not the center of the universe, or why have we been given this perspective if we are in fact not?  There is a collective consciousness that many of us strive for where we need to grasp at in regard to knowing that something bigger than ourselves exists.  Allowing that to exist is where much peace comes from.  We have memories, we have the past, and we think that has shaped us in some unique way.  It has obviously, but how is it any less or more unique or meaningful than someone who knows they have implanted memories, yet is still living in the same day to day way with perceived free will just like the rest of us?  There is a lot of research out there that says when we draw upon our memories at a later date they become more fictitiousness vs anything “true.” We then make expectations, assumptions and decisions about our lives with this perceived truth when in fact there is no such thing as any level of truth.  The only truth that seems true is in fact this ‘untruth’ about all things, but we still have lives to live on the ground within this reality, which in the meantime make it convenient to believe in all sorts of things in order to try and be happy.  With all this being the case and it not really mattering what our perceived reality is, what is really the difference if we have artificial memories or not?


5/19…Expectations vs Experiences, Carl Jung, and the Practicality of Suicide (found in Awareness / Yoga/Meditation)

—-As I sit here and look out over a beautiful northern California field of where I grew up, I think about all that which I experienced here, all that which I’ve experienced now, and all that I will experience.  It is magnificent that an infinite amount of thoughts, memories, fantasies can fill my mind and play off a million others that come in at each micro second.  How am I not just a sputtering, reactionary being going in any which direction from one moment to the next, without really an accurate thought about whatever it is I’m doing…

I’m reading the book “Memories, Dreams, Reflections” by Carl Jung.  Jung describes the human psyche being draped in a lightness that’s easily overwhelmed by darkness.  Behind us there is a shadow that lurks and can be all encompassing if we turn around and see it and allow it to penetrate us.  The feeling is ever present of this shadow and all the while the only way forward without giving into these shadow aspects is a small dimly lit candle we are holding in an environment that is incredibly windy and we have nothing adequate to protect our flame from the elements except our focus and the shell cover of our body.  We feel the shadow wanting our attention but we know we must not, at all costs, let the candle go out because that is all we have in the face of all the darkness. Our human bodies are our energetic light sources in the galactic, dark matter and space of it all.  Being focused and given attention to our dimly lit candle situation is what will keep us moving in at least a direction that is seen as somewhat visible and beyond the dark, reactionary spaces of the shadows…

“Incentivized suicide” is a feeling not motivated by depression, rather, a natural incentive that arises from a yearning to leave the body and move on to perhaps a better situation, environment, etc.  I use the word “incentivized” because it comes simply out of a practicality to exist more efficiently…


4/19…A Daily Prayer and Intentions for a Cactus Medicine Ceremony (found in Awareness / Meditation)

—-Trust intuition. Trust feeling in alignment.  Trust my process.  Trust the darkness.  Allow the darkness.  Trust how I feel my life is supposed to be.  Trust that I know what I have to do to be happy.  Trust the elegance of simplicity.  Trust the joy of the sparkling life seen through the eyes.  Trust feeling calm.  Invest in the energizingly balanced, stimulatory endurance of journeying through a marathon.  Trust my future plans.  Trust that I’m not missing out or that I should or could be better.  Celebrate the path that I’ve been given the opportunity to experience.  Trust unconditional love and embrace truly embodying it.  Trust that love will come to and flow from me in a way I haven’t imagined.  Trust that love will look and feel how I feel strongly for vs anything my minds eye has defined as how it should be symbolized.  Trust not to get stuck in old paradigms of thought, of jails of the mind, of old ways of thinking and being and loving and grasping.  Trust alchemizing and turning coal into gold. Trust that I will see beyond the glitter of distraction.  Trust how I will feel about it all.  Trust the confusion, trust the negativity, trust all that runs through me as the universe is talking to me and sharing info with me.  Trust that it is communication.  Trust my good intentions and continuing to authentically try, and that my life energy is exactly where it’s supposed to be within the natural evolution of my innate being which spans many lifetimes within different containers of experiences and encompasses my whole non-judgmental energetic trajectory spirit source.


4/19…Alan Watts–Love Your Existence…Unconscious and Superconscious Beings (found in Awareness / Connection / Yoga)

—-In order to understand what the self is, we have to remember that it doesn’t need to remember anything in the same way we don’t need to know how to work our thyroid gland.  It just is.  When we die, we don’t have to put up with everlasting non-existence because that’s not an experience.  The yoga and the way of realization is trying to imagine what it would be like to go to sleep and never wake up.  Something happens to us when we think about this.  A realization appears of finding out what it was like to wake up having never gone to sleep.  That was when we were born.  Having an experience of everlasting nothingness doesn’t abide by nature.  We are constant energy swirling around, sometimes landing in containers such as bodies.

This organism of you/us, is a continuous energy of and around everything else that’s going on. However, we have this idea that instead of being the sun, we are just something in the sun, but that’s just a joke. This is the ego.  It is nothing else than the focus of conscious attention. It’s like the radar on a ship exposing if anything is in the way of whatever demands and focus the ego has. Conscious attention is a design of the brain to scan the environment like a radar and look for any trouble-making changes.  If we identify ourselves with our troubleshoots than we define ourselves by being in a perpetual state of anxiety.  The moment we cease to identify with the ego and become aware that we are the whole organism we realize that it is all one beautiful being, we are one magnificent container and beyond.  What is discord at one level of your being is harmony at another.  We suddenly realize that everything that we are and do is at this level, at this equal level, as magnificent and as free of any blemish in the patterns and waves of whatever we experience.


3/19…Integrative Awareness Retreat: Presence, Openness, Awareness (found in Awareness / Relationships / Meditation)

—-My repeating statement dyad work for this first evening was, “I am willing to refrain from holding on, believing old stories of love and connection, and letting sadness overwhelm me.” At first it is incredibly nerve-wracking to be staring into the eyes and doing this with somebody else but then after the first 30 seconds feelings settle. I gradually lost the sense of feeling judged or like I needed to perform or say the ‘correct’ things. A feeling starts to take over that I’m just being witnessed, which feels incredibly good. I go from allowing ‘the other’ to form whatever it is I’m thinking and doing and where a nervous, distracting, unauthentic energy comes about, to a feeling where I’m relieved I can express what I am and that somebody is not judging me which makes me feel cared for and nurtured and actually ‘normal.’ Then, almost instantaneously, a sort of relaxed trance sets in. I feel sensations in my body of where those denser energies are kept and where it moves. It zaps all around to my brain, gut, heart, feet. I have a sense that it doesn’t want to be exposed so it’s trying to hide, but wherever it goes, as I utter the next repeating statement, I know exactly where it is and how it’s making me feel. Eventually my gut breath takes over and I can feel the incredible support I have for myself with deep belly inhales. My belly feels like my support for all of my energy, of all the light and dark that is residing in me. It all is encompassed within the container of my gut. I have stability. My eyes lose their intensity and I’m just ‘being.’ Vision sort of goes in and out. I still am staring at the person across from me but I’m in my own body completely and I might not even see them or maybe their face distorts. Nothing feels intimidating, all of my sadness and my stories that made me nervous upon starting the dyad have melted. The feelings have stopped trying to hide in my body as they are just simply within me now. With each repeating statement the feeling gets more and more squishy and relaxed and real and like I am truly capable of knowing how to stay at or get to this state. As the timer rings, I gently come back, but actually I am not really coming back from anywhere. I am already there. This state is already me.  I don’t have to be defined by anybody or anything but merely just witness the light and dark in the whole container. Nothing has to hide from myself and I can alchemize it. I can breath and use my belly breath for support and keep most of my energy internal. I can do this. I can be in a stable, relaxed state of presence, openness, and acceptance.  I feel like something in me has awoke.  It feels so nice to allow myself to just be.


3/19…A Minimalist and a Hoarder Walk In To a Bar…(found in Awareness, Positive Processing)

—-We live in a culture that pushes consumerism. You are defined by how much stuff you have.  You are cool, hip, sexy, wise, and clever by how much stuff you have. Each moment where you get things is a pure high of some sense of accomplishment. I can now show all of my friends. Hmm, now where do I put it? The dopamine high wears off, but then the best cure for that is to just get more stuff!…If hoarding culture wasn’t pushed so much, would people still grab anything in sight with Gollum like fury of “my precious?” I see people fill up their cars with shit or filet mignon, depending on your perspective. Is this why we were given opposable thumbs, to grasp all the things we can in order to use shit as tools over and over and over again until we finally do learn how to alchemize nothing into something? Humans do trial and error obsessively to the point where it makes me wonder how many humans actually died eating poisonous mushrooms in order to figure out which ones were medicinal. Each human is an outrageous explorer, a numb-nuts, and a Leonardo Da Vinci in his own right. Some hoarders are the garbage disposals of the world. The gut of the human population trying to process and metabolize to the full potential that which has entered the environment by humans. They are driven people. Fascinating!…Then there’s me. A minimalist man in his 30s who has spent the last many years shedding all that which doesn’t serve him in furniture, houses, people, thoughts, etc. All that I own now fits in my car. I can do more with my life without things. I can experience, learn, absorb the content of life more. It can be internalized in an infinite space of storage and grabbed to use at any opportune moment. It’s the difference between living one life in the external world of ‘things’ with how much space/time/money that takes vs being allowed to live many lives using the same amount of energy all while now having the resources to pursue infinitely what my internal focused energies want and have room for. It seems less stressful, affordable, adventurous, practical, and opportunistic…


2/19…Ayahuasca Visionary Description and Reintegration is Harder Than Facing Your Shadow…(found in Plant Teacher Healing/Psychedelia–Ayahuasca and Awareness/Positive Processing)

—-All the shadows of women have no substance but I still pursue, despite feeling nothing. I want to create something out of the nothing and this is what creates feeling for me. By not getting met my feeling and drive heightens. One of these shadowy images will pay attention to me and I’ll be able to connect with something magical that I somehow feel should exist.

I go into a dark crevice and get instantly sucked dry by energetic vampires. The grossness of the women within is obvious but it is beautiful because they are finally showing it. They are tormented souls looking for anything that will nourish them. They absorb all of my energy, feasting on me, and the more I lose the more I relate to their suffering. They are desperate, lurking creatures and their desperation mixes with mine and my whole being takes it all on. It is not their fault but they know nothing else than the love of feasting on others. Sadness overwhelms me and it makes me want to give them more even though it will only be a short-term satisfaction. They want my manhood. They want my seed. They want to take it all and not reciprocate anything, or even know how to reciprocate anything. They know nothing else than consumption and my sadness brings me closer to their darkness. I’m allowing my sadness to be used against me. Somehow it is sexy. The dance it took to get her, the infatuation, the obsession, the intoxication, and I give willingly knowing I’m prostituting myself. I feel like it’s my role to support the plight of others who need it more, who have led unfortunate lives and haven’t learned any better. Jesus Christ model boyhood imprints.  It all is a self-defeating sickness.

The allure of the darkness is in me. It can be so sexy and mesmerizing, and it makes me FEEL so much. The pain and depression are horrible but outrageously attractive in how all-encompassing and all-consuming it is. It’s so enticing to want to give it all, to try and nourish it and see if you can capture and satisfy it, and to see if I can get something that doesn’t give to give to me. I’ll always feel like I can win and get lost in fantasies about what it would be like to reign in this darkness energy and control it. Its eluding power is its power and the irony is that it wouldn’t exist if it gave me the attention I obsess over. I’ll always feel like I can help it, should help it, capture it, even though it is impossible to do so. This will forever be my work.


2/19…“Homo Deus” Book Commentary. Knowing What to Ignore, Overstimulation of Information Creating Censorship, Intelligence vs Consciousness. The Age of Giving Our Minds Over to Highly Intelligent, Non-Conscious Algorithms…(found in Save Me From Technology)

—-We are allowing non-conscious, yet highly intelligent algorithms to run our lives and override our human consciousness.  These algorithms are quickly learning to know us better than we know ourselves.  Our brains are rapidly changing and catering to these algorithms.  Are organisms really just algorithms and is life really just about data processing and is intelligence really the rule that we all are run by?  What is going to happen to society and daily life when non-conscious algorithms know us better than ourselves?  Suddenly consciousness is becoming obsolete.  Nobody knows what the future holds but the present era is filled with massive confusion and stress related to information overload.  Each person is dealing with an internal battle for if they should pay attention and be formed by the intelligence of that which stimulates them and seems to be powerful in organizing our societies, or by the source of consciousness by which they know they are led to be human? It is very lopsided at the moment with intelligence dramatically winning…


1/19…LSD and Dream States.  Living Beyond the Symbols and Communicating with the Subconsciousness.  Human Beings Having a Spiritual Experience VS Spiritual Beings Having a Human Experience…(Found in Psychedelia/LSD and Meditation and Awareness/Positive Processing)

—-When we get stuck in our minds with literal and materialistic solutions to life, we are human beings having a spiritual experience. When we learn to really tune in to the universe, to use our minds to go beyond the mind, beyond our human solutions and symbols, to the source of what we know from our innate intelligence, to the source of our subconsciousness, to the grand mystery of what the universe is made up, we turn into spiritual beings having a human experience. We often think we have solutions to our problems and mental health issues but often only from a narrow perspective of the material world and what our culture advertises to us in regards to what is ‘normal’ and human. There is a vastness of understanding that goes way beyond this. Our subconscious is trying to be the medium of communication from the universe within and around us. Things like dreams and psychedelics are ways we can understand the world and what we need to do to transcend into different beings.

A communication has woken up inside me as a way for my subconscious to talk to myself. This universal energy is me, but it isn’t me, as I feel separate from it. How does the grand mystery of life talk to us? It talks to us through the grand mystery of our subconscious. When I interpret my dreams or psychedelic experiences literally it leads me down pathways of depression and extremes and erratic-ness. The subconsciousness is not human and doesn’t operate in the human world. Your subconscious uses symbols to communicate that will trigger emotional responses. How does one go beyond the symbol and rather to the emotional response? These are the knowledge maps your subconscious gives you.

Giving face value to most of what you experience is incredibly misleading. Awareness of ‘how’ things have effects on you is the best medicine of all and followed by attempting to maintain patience sitting with it. Far less important is the ‘why’ as most of the time it’s not relevant and easily to get lost in the infinite muck…


1/19…Learning and Brain Resistance.  How to Find Peace in the Mind for Concentration and Learning.  Repetitious Muscle Memory Learning with Ukulele VS Faith Based, Soul Learning and Personality Transition with Spanish Acquisition. (Found in Learning and Awareness and Stress, Trauma, Anxiety, ADD/ADHD)

—-To really absorb learning, one has to dive into their soul and have awareness for how they actually are. How do they respond when their brain resists so vehemently?  What situations, people, environments deplete them and what do they need to do to be in better states of health to absorb that which makes them expand and grow?

One has to learn how to learn learning in order to really be able to learn efficiently and expansively and not have it be overall depleting or resentment building.  Those feelings will always creep up on you and win, and crush everything you’re doing.

At the end of a few weeks, with 15-30 minutes of this brain, muscle memory practice a day, you know how to play a song.  As you play the song in full it is extraordinarily fun and rewarding.  Soon you can’t remember how it was that you didn’t know it.  Slowly, gratitude for having learned can diminish, as now you know, so what’s the difference in the here and now?  It’s a part of you and you move on.  The difficult process starts all over again and you sort of hate it and love it. It’s always been funny to me how much the brain RESISTS to learn.  It is really this strange combination of a stubborn child throwing a tantrum simply because they have to do something, and an overprotective parent who would rather their child lead a boring and unstimulating life because safety is priority number one.  Your brain resists at every second, screaming at you, “You’re doing something wrong! This is not how we learned!”  To bypass such situations with the brain, one just commits to the process.  The process of what one wanted before they started to learn something new and the screaming occurred.  Repetition is the most important thing as this is the only defense against the overbearing, unlearning mind.  Even if it’s only 5 to 10 minutes a day.  The repetition is you communicating with your brain that this is the new ‘right’ and a retraining of the muscle is in order.  The brain and mind does not control you and it’s important to not let it do so or else you will be stuck in perpetual loop cycles of acting the same in every way in your life forever…


12/18…Getting Robbed in Mexico.  Darkness Leading to Light and How the Universe Talks to Us (Found in ‘Awareness and Positive Processing’ and ‘Trauma.’)

—-“Twas the night before Xmas, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse; the stockings were hung by the chimney with care, in the hopes that St. Nicholas would soon be there; the children were nestled all snug in their beds, while visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads…”

Christmas is a wonderful time of year for those that have.  It is very easily a miserably depressing time of year for those who have not. The lines above from the famous poem, “The Night Before Xmas” exemplify this pressure.  Children lay asleep in their beds dreaming of sugar plums and other fancy things and that someone will magically fill their stockings and deliver them gifts.  We make our children and our society believe in this mirage, to believe that at an early age presents and gifts and materialism defines love, defines your sense of self-worth, defines your sense of want, defines your sense of family, and as the gift that never stops giving, defines your sense as an adult to keep pursuing “things” that will dictate your happiness levels.  Largely overall, this is the message that is left as an imprint with how we mostly celebrate Christmas.


12/18…..The addiction to cigarettes might want a cigarette and need security, and if it gets security it will feel peaceful. So the nectar will be a feeling of peace. By feeding the demon the emotional feeling that underlies the desire for the substance, we address the core issue instead of just the symptoms. And if the stress demon that wants success ultimately needs to feel relaxed, feeding it a feeling of relaxation will put an end to its compulsive activity.

Lama Tsultrim Allione
from her book Feeding Your Demons.


12/18…..The Intricacies of a Positive Mental Health Practice, Technology Balance, Awareness, and Dopamine Hits (Found in Save Me From Technology and Others)

—-We spend our whole lives BECOMING the way we are, some of us build awareness for HOW we are, and an even smaller amount ACCEPT that fully and then grow in an empowered, positive direction from there. We spend a shit ton of time forever holding onto things and attach meaning to the mind for however we have been in our lives. Letting go is thus a herculean task.

My own process is committed to a self-love practice and learning how to sit in stillness where a certain ‘nothingness’ is achieved. A nothingness that brings about observation of my life for what I truly feel connected with to persist rather than listening to the noisy chamber of my mind blasting away in extremes and busyness at every moment. If I don’t commit to this with my time and patience, my life passively becomes overwhelmingly shrouded in anxiety, depression, addiction, trauma reactions, etc. I have awareness for paying special attention to what situations in life give me that graspy feeling. When do I become desirous and obsessed with an idea and am no longer present? When do I find myself out of control with my intentions and prayers in life? How do I cater to being in a connection mindset with myself, others, and life vs just wanting something for the ‘hit’ of whatever it is? When I listen to myself, better situations and people arise where a lightness is present and an equal exchange of giving and receiving happens. Feelings of empowerment and respect for self and others arise. Unconditional love grows and that giving and receiving feel the same as life is being lived through you vs you attempting to have any control over it. It just is happening. Today I trust in patience. I trust in the obviousness of what keeps speaking to me and if it is expansive and connective in nature or narrow and depletive

We may look at people and judge and think they are living in really unhealthy ways, but those people are on their own path and have no idea what they are going through. Maybe you’re right about them, maybe not. It doesn’t really matter because it’s not about you. What’s about you is the peace you have in your heart about who you are. Maybe the other is truly at peace with how they are, no matter how ironic or unhealthy it may come across. There is no right or wrong in any of this and that is important to remember. It’s not about the other and getting lost in that is a recipe for disaster. Your inner peace and own energy trajectory and mental health are what’s important. One can be sane in a perceived insane world as long as they continually make efforts to feed their soul and connect to the communal spirit. It doesn’t really matter if all of the “others” are demons or capitalistic personalities or whatever. Labels don’t really matter vs what is happening and processing inside of you. What happens when one stops trying so hard at trying to organize, label, control, worry, be overwhelmed about the external world so much, and rather, bring that energy in?


11/18…..Yoga is of The Mind, for The Mind, to go Beyond The Mind.  A Holistic Yoga Teacher Training at the Yoga Forest with Kula Collective! (Found in Yoga, Meditation, Breathwork, Learning)

—-Yoga is a practice of returning to intention. Returning to the original stillness. We bring our mind to rest upon stillness, like a blank canvas.  When the mind is still, it reflects truth, and pure consciousness and we find the mind to be open, relaxed, spacious, calm, present, at peace. We find we actually can attain this still, luminous silence and become ever more aware.  A mind filled with constant awareness has become awakened to its true nature.

The problem is not in ‘thinking’ itself, but in not knowing we are thinking.

One allows their mind to become pure and calm by cultivating friendliness toward the happy, compassion towards the unhappy, delight towards the virtuous, and equanimity (the space, the non-reaction) towards the unrighteousness. Loving without understanding and with a light heart is crucial. The practice is a will that is filled with steady and persistent effort. It is honest and confident, yet humble. Eventually effort becomes effortless. The concentration of one’s efforts soon find themselves in natural flow as we allow and practice non-attachment by not clinging or grasping or holding onto expected results. As we encounter the burning and fire that rages inside of us from our addictions, we continue to learn how to respond to our life vs react, while keeping our energetic center in the face of all that is external that tries to pull us out. Yoga involves surrendering into the divine and trusting the universe. Whatever moves the universe is beautiful and one can trust in this bigger picture and the flow that is happening all around us. With continued practice, ‘Vipassana’ can occur which is clear insight and having the ability to step outside of our minds, outside of our comfort zones, our habits, our addictions, our personalities, etc. It is the ability to transform and become different people while always maintaining and valuing who we were and our process as a beautiful means to a never reaching end. Life is lived in the process and journey in yoga.


11/18…..A Self-Love Birthday Letter and Self Marriage Vows (found in Tantra Connection, Sex, Love, Meditation–Love)


  1. I vow to always see me and be me
  2. I vow to vibrantly dance as much as possible in body felt, confident, honest flow
  3. I vow to be kind and gentle
  4. I vow to be more present and listen to the intelligence in my heart and body
  5. I vow to not get stuck in or give meaning to my mind and simply to observe it in meditation and stillness
  6. I vow to never give up on me and embrace the smile that wants to exude from my heart as nobody else is responsible for that
  7. I vow to keep challenging myself and never stop learning and teach others what I learn
  8. I vow to embrace change and not give into fear and ‘grasping’ behavior for what I want in life.
  9. I vow to not feel like I need to prove myself or compare myself to others
  10. I vow to walk towards embracing giving and receiving unconditional love


11/18…..Go Fund Me donation Campaign for building a cacao mill for a local women’s collective in San Marcos, Guatemala.


10/18…..How to Identify Psychological Manipulation.  How the Trump Appointed U.S. Supreme Court Nominee Brett Kavanaugh Helps us Understand Textbook Definitions of Narcissism, Psycho and Sociopathic Behavior, Lying, Gas-Lighting, etc (Found in Recognizing and Dealing with Psychopathic, Sociopathic, and Narcissistic Behavior)

—-What’s relevant here is that Kavanaugh is using every trick in the lying, psychopathic, narcissistic, gas lighting textbook. It is very clear what he is doing. There are classes taught about this stuff.  It is hard to see because it is tricky and not a lot of people know what is going on. They fall victim to these types of people, get confused, blame themselves and then continue getting tortured and used and abused by these people. It was clear to see how Kavanaugh was purposely misleading people about his life by creating confusion, not answering questions, creating foggy realities of delusion, using all sorts of psychological manipulation, and lying overall.

When this type of behavior is encountered in anybody’s life it should instantly ring signs of high alarm and one should do anything possible to get this person out of a position of any influence and, personally, attempt to get as far away from such a person as possible. Interacting with such a person is a lose, lose and operating in their world is impossibly depleting and demanding as they will do anything to keep their warped reality alive. There is very little one can do when connected to such a person as the world view of the narcissist will keep such behavior continuing, hence, why separating yourself is really the only supported successful method for ridding yourself of such people and their vampiric and abusive behavior.


9/18…..Love and Fear and a Conversation with Unconditional Love (Found in Tantra Connection, Sex, Love, Meditation–Love)

—-Be a warrior of gentleness, kindness, patience, and vulnerability in regard to fear.  Set aside the path of aggression when dealing with fear.  It is not the enemy to engage in imaginary spiritual battles with.  Invite it to sit next to you.  Fear longs to be known and paid attention toand harboring the greater landscape of love toward your fears allows the power of love to positively affect fear.  Fear is more like a child of love and love would never turn from any of its children, including the temporary, wavelike child of fear.  When fully seen, met, engaged, and safe passage provided, fear is able to reveal itself and is no other than a form of love in disguise.

There is a ‘gold’ offered in unconditional love that I’m learning to harbor and shine forth.  It’s a love connection that blurs the divide between giving and receiving.  Where does my body end vs where does the other’s start?  My mind is not really my own mind anymore and the feeling prevails that it’s not really about me in my life.  It is not about what ‘I’ can get anymore as I move away from the me, me, me mentality.  Communicating and being in our ‘being’ with whatever it is we are doing produces outrageous amounts of stress-free living, connection with others, and expansive benefit to ourselves and all those we surround ourselves with.  Harboring true intentions of actions related to expressing love and nurturing for the other is where the magic of unconditional love comes from. It takes the control out of it. It takes the standardization out of it. It takes the expectation and resentment out of it.  It allows us trust and surrendering to fully make up a loving connection as truth and growth is at the center of it and we feed off each other and it is obvious what we are experiencing.


9/18…..Ayahuasca Integration: Using Lead to Make Gold, Internal Silence, Changing Behavior, and Love (Found in Psychedelia–Ayahuasca)

—-An alchemist needs led to make gold. Without being confused and having nothing, without having pain and turmoil, without having disruption at whatever we end up with that is not “perfect”, there is nothing to find. There is no self-actualization and hence no self-transcendence.  What mountains of led are looming in your life? Do you want to become rich? How patient are you willing to be?

What is acting authentic? How much energy does it take to make something happen? Is being authentic using force, control and ultimately depleting ourselves to make something happen, or, is it rather using and responding to energy to recycle or upcycle itself in order to create more fluid, expansive states of being? Do you want to feel full or empty?

When passion, obsession, love come into the mind a control tendency tends to emerge. Of course we want to experience the highs all the time of such emotions that surge so powerfully through us. We want to control it! However, does this come from a place of insecurity perhaps?

How do we not get let down with love? How do we truly embrace change and represent an unconditional love that can be the only truly kind of love that can withstand the change that time inevitably brings? In this sense, it wouldn’t matter if the loves you strove for worked out or not because you would be an unconditional love warrior spirit and the way you danced through life would dictate more how you interacted with love rather than whatever people or jobs or situations came into and out of your life


8/18…..Sitting with Dense Negativity (Found in Meditation–Positive Processing)

—–The stimulation of intensely feeling something makes me feel like I exist.  Somewhere along the way, a darkness crept into this stimulation pursuit. I often can attach myself to negativity because in it I see the potential for the most growth, for the most stimulation to occur.  The cliché is more pain equals more gain, or even “Jesus died for your sins.”

I grasp for the ultimate growth but the pure negativity exposure at times has conditioned me more. The pattern continues until depletion and exhaustion sets in.  Habits and addictions are hard to break, and I’ve felt out of control with this loop pattern of thought.  It has reached breaking points, where I felt my mental state cracking and I’ve noticed trauma response setting in at times or even a natural incentive build for not wanting to experience life anymore.  If I had a pressure valve it would almost be to a state of blowing up the pressure cooker.  I don’t want to end up always constantly chasing stimulation.  I don’t want something like achievement of the ultimate good, or boredom to be the cause of me reaching for the negative.  There is only a certain amount of pressure that is healthy to be exposed to.

The rabbit energy in me is afraid of missing out!  And it treats me likes shit and in no way that I would ever dare of treating others


8/18…..How to Change and Learning Awareness with the Ukulele, Meditation, and Spanish (Found in Yoga, Meditation, Learning)

—–The patience of learning is realizing that for most of us it takes exposing yourself or trying at something 50 to 100 times before you can even start to possibly feel comfortable with something.  That’s a big commitment and one can spend their whole life in a beginner stage of always being a learner if they take on many things.  It is very humbling to know you’re going to look stupid learning but there is immense POWER in that, and extremely powerful people realize this and aren’t afraid of it.  If we are true to ourselves, we will ultimately gravitate to and give consistent time and energy to the things we like and learn them in ways we want. Such pursuits are not so much rewarded in our society, as being a professional at something tends to make the most money, but it really does seem to be where people experience more forms of happiness.  There’s a reason why there is a whole form of meditation and thought referred to as “Beginners Zen Mind.”  A beginner’s mind keeps us humble and fresh and always yearning for more.  It creates the appropriate balance of growth, effort, results that lead to keeping life in flow and not focused too heavily on any one thing, which would be harder to change from.  This creates for us to be more capable of change because we know we are capable of learning new things, and to be more capable of change is to be good at and better prepared for the one thing that is most prevalent and consistent in life.


8/18…..Being, Mindful Life, Mindful Meditation (Found in Meditation / Mindful Meditation)

—–To be mindful means that we are paying attention to our experience and sensation, in the present moment, accepting them and free of judgement, and observing it with curiosity and not trying to ‘fix’ anything. Approaching difficulty in this way allows us to cultivate equanimity which is an unshakeable peace of mind in the face of anything that life throws at you.

Mindfulness helps us notice when we are being seduced into thoughts of the past or future.  How much do we get stuck in day dreaming?  How much do we explode with happiness or sadness about the past or future? Positive or negative daydreaming thoughts have similar overall outcomes in our mind. Yes, of course positive thoughts are positive and easier to handle but everything has its equal and opposite reaction, so extremes in positive thoughts often leave us more open to have extremes in negatives. Seeing your extremes and being aware of them vs actually always living in them is being mindful.

Mindfulness presents the possibility of actually attending to the anxiety by ‘leaning’into it and putting our head into the lion’s mouth of our problems. This leads to creating an instant dissolving of whatever we thought our problems were. It is very real that fear is rather an acronym (F, E, A, R–False Evidence Appearing Real). What are we afraid to experience by not going towards and living on the other side of our fears? Once crossing that threshold, it is pretty apparent to feel that what we had built up about our fears was actually WAY WORSE than us actually crossing over into and living in our fear.


8/18…..Being in the Mind (Found in Anxiety)

—–I sit in nature. Observing comes natural to me. I don’t want to talk or interact, only to notice as it seems energetically safe and not depleting. I see people and stare at them in regards to their nature. I’m curious about the sounds from their mouths and the expectation of what is wanted. Oh yeah react! Words are suddenly needed to be put together to define what I’m feeling. Um, “Mangos!” My felt sense is not translating well to the other. An incredible anxious and draining feeling comes…..


7/18…..Two Months in a Jungle Peruvian Ayahuasca Temple and Learning How to Die (Found in Holistic Health / Plant Teacher Healing / Psychedelia–Ayahuasca)

—-To put into one writing all that happened over the last two months over the span of 11 Ayahuasca ceremonies and working at the Temple and the other deep immersion work done seems a bit overwhelming.  If I were to sum up everything as quickly as possible it would be that I encountered: my families generational trauma which came in the form of vast anxiety and control issues, how I’ve failed to learn from the past, dealing with dense depression and sadness and my heart getting ripped open, healing from trauma in the past and learning from loving relationships, having my penis fall off and being forced to deal with intimate connection and my masculinity in a new way, learning how to protect myself from vampires and create boundaries and protection for myself in general, learning how to have gratitude for everything that I’ve experienced, recognizing that whatever triggers me is led that can be turned into self-awareness gold, truly moving on from old identities and getting beyond valuing my life solely in accomplishments, obligations, tasks and partnered love pursuits, learning how to shut the fuck up and embrace silence and my internal process, learning how to truly absorb inner peace and getting beyond judgements and expectations, really loving and seeing myself for the extremely fiery, energetic, mixed with silent, flowy water energy person that I am, who is positively steadfast, consistent in his authentic turtle-approach, curious, loving, and in constant pursuit of self-awareness.  I learned how to get out of my mind and be more in my body.  I learned how to meditate and to focus on my breathing.  I learned how to let things die.  I learned how to be re-born and better invest in positive people and energy. I went beyond my reality model by not believing in all the old stories for a change and then came back again to something more real and truthful.  The phrase, “you’re already dead, what’s the difference?” was an extremely funny, blunt truth, shinning force for me that gave me confidence and energy to truly allow myself to live, to rest, and accept the life/death ride in whatever comes up.  Because what’s the difference in the end where life ends or begins?  What does it matter?  I could be already dead so then what?  The feeling is so comforting as it takes away so many life pressures of accomplishment and allows for stillness, lightness, restfulness and a true creative trajectory of energy to be absorbed and practiced.  I’m already dead!  Yah thank god!


7/18…..Mushroom Growing.  Take Control of Your Own Medicine! (Found in Holistic Health/Plante Teacher Healing/Psychedelia–Psilocybin Mushrooms)

— is such a huge place.  Pointing you in the right direction is key as not all the information on the site is credible. If you decide to grow and want to just grow for yourself, watch the Roger Rabbit PF Tek Video. And read this EvilMushroom666’s post on the topic of PF Tek on Shroomery. They also have a great community for growing ethnobotanical gardens, growing gourmet and medicinal mushrooms and a wonderful psychedelic community.  I do recommend purchasing Roger Rabbit’s video series Let’s Grow Mushrooms! for $9 if the youtube doesn’t work. Between the PF Tek Roger Rabbit BRF video and EvilMushroom’s tek, growing for yourself is really easy.

Specific notes and instructions in actual post…


6/18…..Learning Language, Facing Yourself, and the Magic Potion of Alcohol! (Found in Positive Processing)

—-Over the past years, I have liked less and less hearing my own voice and participating in this constant nonstop talking social norm. I value a lot more people who I can feel comfortable being in silence with or people who just bring about a relaxed presence. I crave stillness, meditation like energy, and calm more than I used to. Words being just “noise” is not the only thing we should rely on. Rather, the “sound” incorporated in the meaning of language, and words that are thought out would probably produce less talking overall. People who don’t understand this usually end up de-railing any conversation or sharing a funny story pertaining to something about themselves and never bringing it back to what was originally being talked about. They don’t listen to others and might as well be talking to a wall.

This era of my life where I’m seeing this more and how words can easily just fill of space for me is exhausting to participate in and be around. You can’t really tell people to shut up and people will think your weird if you don’t talk. I guess the point here is to not hang out with such people but it’s hard because it’s not something a lot of people tend to grasp, but it has led me to be way more selective in who I spend my time with.

Relating to Spanish, my reaction to speak less in English can negatively affecting my learning process to try and speak as much as I can in Spanish. I’m having to re-train myself for when I start talking to someone in Spanish to not just say a few things and then move on, but rather, try and ask and say as many things as possible! Ha! Now I’m that person blabbing away, and not only blabbing away but speaking in crazy broken language and not really understanding what is being said back to me. Can you see why this is such a humbling experience? I’m having to push through my own annoyance level of what I don’t like in terms of language and talking and having to actually embody those elements in order to learn. And in a way this all makes sense. Me being a foreigner and not understanding language is a lot like being that annoying person who doesn’t really know how to communicate


5/18…..A Life For Witnessing (Found in Mindful Meditation / Life Balance)

—-How do we increase our skills for WITNESSING our lives.  It is very powerful for me to think that I am just watching myself at moments.  It makes it funny.  It makes me take more interest in my life.  Weird how if I was watching my life I would be entertained and want to tune in more in general.  Maybe this is a product of the millennial video game generation.  Our lives are somehow more interesting if we were “playing” them in a game or on a screen!  Only with the presence of absolutely no screens and connection does the feeling return of being content with being the one playing out their “life game” on the screen.  Hmm, how did this happen?  Ahhhh humans…


4/18…..Ayahuasca: Integrating Healing Through Developing Healthy Positive Relationships.  An Attempt to Stop Bullshitting Yourself and Commit to a Process of Awareness and Vulnerable Power (Found in Psychedelia–Ayahuasca)

—-Many of us have control issues which can hijack the entire experience in the name of needing to “do it right” or following the idea that more of a good thing is better.  Such people, however, are particularly lost in their mind and disconnected from their inner guidance system.  They will read words like “surrender” and “trust” and “listen with your heart” and “engage” and “vulnerability” but not have a clue what they mean and will wrack their analytical brains trying to find the correct algorithm to execute, and despair easily because they don’t feel they are “doing it right” and continue to blame things outside of them.  In these scenarios, it is useful to speak with a guide who has experience and EMOTIONAL AWARENESS.

Just lying there, breathing deeply and saying ‘do your thing, lover, I am open, I am ready to give up “doing” and to be present to this experience”’ is the best thing you can “do”.  “Turning towards” and “allowing” what is happening while breathing is the process involved in laying the seeds of change, empowerment, awareness, vulnerability, love, etc.

Ayahuasca is a relationship, a spiritual communion guided by the heart.  She sometimes tells you what you need to hear for the growth of your spirit, even if it is not the literal or absolute truth.  Such a relationship requires ENGAGEMENT AND PARTICIPATION.  Below here are just a few ideas for positive or healthy ways to engage in any relationship which can be applied to Ayahuasca.  This is only meant to disarm unhelpful ways of relating and stimulate the parts of you already relating healthily to go deeper in that direction.


3/18…..Ayahuasca Exposing Love and Attachment Darkness (Found in Psychedelia–Ayahuasca)

—-As I sat rolled up and face down in a ball of despair on my mat during an Ayahuasca ceremony a vast darkness loomed over me.  My stomach was turning with absolute anxiety.  Morbid visions of demented faces occurred in my mind’s eye.  While a perfectly wonderful and happy song was playing a tsunami feeling of anger and hurt and being triggered through love and past love connections was taking a heavy load on my heart.  How I’ve “failed” others and punished myself because of it.  How others have “failed” me and how I’m punishing them or punishing myself for why it didn’t work out.

Ayahuasca medicine exposed this weakness and darkness to me.  My heart will literally die sooner in my life if I don’t change.  I tried to escape it while sitting on my mat.  I tried to become smaller and hide further hoping that somehow I could just burrow my head and be forgotten into the ground.  In my uncomfortable crouched position my feet, legs, and hips all fell asleep as I knew I was inflicting pain on myself.  I was pissed and angry that I had to move.  That I had to act in life.  That I had to take accountability for why I was feeling all of these things.  The pain in my lower body was getting so great and starting to compete with how I have “failed” myself and others in life.  The negative mental loop cycles were having no mercy on me.  The anger and resentment was at a peak and then the break came.  I had to understand a new realization about love and attachment in my life.  I had to partake more in emotional honesty about what and who I was and how I wanted love to be enacted coming from a healthier place vs always leading to self-hate, insecurity, and reactionary trauma freezes.  I started to move.  The tingling pain was unbearable.  It took forever for me to get my feet on the ground.  It felt like I was re-birthed and learning how to walk again as a new era of a more mature love and connection had now arrived.


3/18…..Humping the Ayahuasca Antidote vs Creating Awareness.  What We Are Not Aware of Controls Us.  (Found in Psychedelia–Ayahuasca)

—-Being human is hard, painful and confusing and of course we want to make it easy, painless and comprehensible.  The antidote fantasy spirals out of control for that quick-fix, for the angelic portal and the cure for the condition of being human; pain, darkness, boredom, emptiness, meaninglessness.  When we find something that seems to work, we have an incredible “Eureka” moment and cling to it desperately, repeating it obsessively until reality catches up with us again and the “solution” works less and less and then are in need of a new “antidote” that makes us feign and itch for that next fix that starts the cycle all over again.  How many times in our lives will you have “found it” before you realize that perhaps something is ultimately alluding you?

Awe-inspiring drugs which travel from the market place to your bloodstream at the speed of advertising and tweak instantly almost any parameter of being human fully symbolize the antidote fantasy.  They sling-shot you into other dimensions, short-circuit a psychotic episode, deliver you from flesh-eating bacteria and get your dick hard under any circumstances.  These “solutions” give substance to your life.  They give meaning to how you can avoid pain and receive pleasure.  They allow you to rely on something outside of yourself.  They allow you to disassociate from your own healing and feel taken cared of.  You can tune out what is uncomfortable by tuning in to consume what we suggest will make you feel good as feeling good is the same thing as being fulfilled in life.  Feeling pleasure is the same thing as being satisfied, whole and connected.  Feeling good is healing.  Feeling good is meaningful.  All of this is taken for granted and seems to make as much sense as your first name


3/18…..Ayahuasca: Antidote vs Tool to the Condition of Being Human (Found in Psychedelia–Ayahuasca)

—–You spend your day constantly inundated with exciting solutions; ORGASM, NOSEJOB, SPARKLY THINGS.  The day continues, your idle moments spent on FACEBOOK, INSTAGRAM, SPAPCHAT comparing yourself to others, getting depressed you aren’t doing more, and branding your life to make it look cool.  But social media is real right?  Unfortunately, very far from the truth.  Most of the time, nothing can be deduced from social media except for what kind of mental health issues, insecurities, projections, false senses of selves people are dealing with.  Authenticity is rare.  Actually, it is rare in real life as well as no one wants to be found out for who they really are.  Social media and orgasms and nosejobs more often than not keep us in the throes of our own anxieties and neurotic thoughts.  More and more we cater to the behavior and reactions that perfectly fit an algorithm.  The algorithm is spit back to us and we continue to react.  The algorithm keeps adjusting till it gets better at making us notice, distracting us into thinking we ought to live our life a certain way.  Is this not the first generation of artificial intelligence?  The algorithm comes from us but it controls us in our passive lives which then controls us in our active lives.  It takes work for the algorithm to not define us.


3/18…..Journeying with Meditation (Found in Meditation–Mindful Meditation)

—–“I think, therefore, I am” has amazing intellectual roots in enlightenment but it can easily turn into “I think, therefore, I am entitled” or “I think, therefore, it is true.”  We have to come up with something new for what to do with our thoughts, otherwise, we’ll hit a glass ceiling of advancement and our thoughts will be stuck in loops and never ending.  Our anxieties and impatience never ending.  Our depressions and judgments will turn into talons gripping onto our sense of self.  You can’t think your way out of these things.  If you ignore them they fester and ooze out more and more as time passes.  This is when being present in the body and paying attention to the breath can offer a solution.  It creates such psychological calm to just be breathing, to have to worry about nothing else for a minute, to give yourself a reset of even a few minutes of what you put on yourself each day.

As I venture back into my mind, I don’t try to fix anything.  I don’t try to figure anything out.  I don’t try to find solutions.  I don’t pay attention to what is right or wrong.  I don’t pay attention to what I want or how I’ve been wronged or what needs to be done or who is right.  I just observe what comes up and that simple act instantly deflates negative thoughts.  It brings about connection and calm to others when we get over ourselves and let go.  I move away from judgement and expectations about my life and allow them to flow through me and they actually pass.  I am perfect in this existence.  I am perfect in this breath and in my body.  I am perfect and in love with myself and what I’ve done.  I don’t have to cater to expectations and pressures and judgements.  I can actually cater to self-love and confidence where I don’t worry about not doing enough, not loving enough, not “accomplishing the important things” in life. All these negative neurotic thoughts define what I need to work on and how I need to be interacting better with myself and those around me.  They are all little parts of me that do not come close to defining me overall…


2/18…..Practicing Self Love (Found in Mindful Meditation / Life Balance)

—–Everything is a reflection of how you treat yourself.  Give yourself the love and attention that you have not learned how to give yourself up to this point. Love your own heart.

One of the biggest manifestations of violence that we can see in the world is actually the silent violence we give to ourselves, the internal dialog, the things we tell ourselves.  So sit down, take the time to clear your mind and connect with your breath and actually really hug yourself and relentlessly tell yourself “I love you, I love you”.  Recognize all this yearning shadow as your inner child looking for your attention, longing for your attention, just wanting to be loved. Embrace yourself completely and radically accept you as you are, “I love you, I love you”, keep repeating, “I love you”.

Self-love starts with something crucial.  It begins with a radical acceptance of who you are. Completely, with all your shadow, with all the aspects that you do not want to show to anyone, with all our addictions and dysfunctionalities, with everything, all the things that we don’t like to project, all the things that we reject about ourselves, all the things that we feel ashamed of showing.

If you recognize that love is what you are seeking in the core of your life experience, then declare your only interest to shift your point of awareness from abiding in the mind to abiding in the heart.  Any time you find yourself feeling in a way that feels uncomfortable to you, instead of thinking about what you think it represents, just simply bring your attention to the heart and be interested in feeling what you are feeling and not thinking about it.  The more times you simply bring attention into the heart, just to feel your experience and not think about it, the more your body will actually open up


1/18…..Having Balanced Brain Chemistry Sex with Karezza Sex While Avoiding The Negative, Depletive Effects of Dopamine Spiked Orgasmic Sex (Found in Tantra Connection, Sex, Meditation)

—–The climax of orgasmic sex on the brain is the biggest blast of neurochemicals that you can engineer for yourself.  When researchers looked at brain scans of ejaculating people they looked just liked the brain scans of people shooting up heroine.  There is something referred to as the “pleasure trap” that gets people in trouble that can be applied here to orgasmic sex.  How can we avoid the pleasure trap as the search for constant, new stimulation can easily be a downward spiral for people to easily become addicted to and resentful overall at others for not meeting their impossible pleasure needs?

Our bodies have two programs running.  One is the mating program which is all about mating and dopamine seeking and passion filled, orgasm producing and off spring producing and separation with your partner producing.  This program allows you more to experience bonding with the experience of orgasm and “getting off.”  It is a gene expression to combine with as many other mates immune systems as possible to allow genes the best possibility to survive.  The other program taps into neural receptors that allow you to experience bonding with the person as we are one of the few species that have developed the brain capacity for falling in love and pair bonding.  Karezza sex taps into that second programing.  It includes having lots of intercourse.  Mostly gentle intercourse that is not orgasmic goal driven.  It includes making love in waves which includes getting aroused and then calming back down.  We evolutionary respond to signals that allow us to pair bond and they all evolved from the same signals that keep mammal care givers attached to male infants.  In human lovers these slightly altered same signals are often referred to as “attachment cues” and include smiling with eye contact, skin to skin contact, gazing into each other’s eyes, kissing with lips and tongues, holding and spooning each other, wordless sounds of content like “oh and ah” sounds, stroking, hugging, massaging, licking and kissing body parts, gentle intercourse, etc.  These kinds of signals deliver a soothing message to the primal brain of the amygdala for lowering our defenses and makes us feel safe, gives us psychological calm, and overall increases love connection and pair bonding.


1/18…..A Love Interpretation (Found in Tantra, Sex, Meditation–Mindful Meditation / Life Balance)

—–There is a yearning for stimulation. The life wave comes from these still waters. Water reaches its full potential to move towards energy. It starts forming itself with other waves. The unity is wondrous. It bounces off the sea cliff beneath it or gets swirled around in wind. The perfect unity creates power. It creates buildup. It creates a peak in energy. It creates a unity of waves. They work together. Nothing can be better. Creating a wave is one of nature’s simplest gifts. There is a love dance. All entities are engaged, fully absorbing of how to become better. Expansion is obvious. Rising ever higher to something that not even the waves know but they keep working together nonetheless. You don’t question it. You fully absorb this magnificent creation. You fully embrace it. You don’t let anything stand in the way of the march towards an obvious, elusive goal. It is energy intensive. The stillness and focus from before this stage gives you strength. You push forth and seem to understand the reason and need for existence. It is this feeling. It is catering to this obvious flow, this obvious push. How could it be any other way? Was it ever any other way? This is a high beyond highs.

Love is created to fulfil nature and the collective consciousness. It is created to make life go on. Even though we experience it, it is not created solely for you. You are a small part of it to feel it in surges at times. Feel the surge and totally absorb it but don’t get stuck on it. Don’t get stuck on the peak wave. It is just as crucial to yearn for creating the stillness, for the creating the opposite of those surge love moments, as those are just as much a part of love as the peak wave. Allow others to find love because it is your love. Single felt love contributes to the greater love. Allow the grip of peak love to be let go of. Allow the jealousies of your own stimulated love to be let go of. Allow the body stimulations to be let go. It will come your way at various moments again and then it will be gone as your turn is up and nature needs you to perform another role in the love cycle. Others will experience your love. Others will experience the love of someone you loved. The cycle of love keeps creating itself. It is ever manifesting. Limiting others in love is limiting yourself in love. Get beyond the glass ceiling and truly expand…


1/18…..Being Capable of Great Sex (Found in Tantra Connection, Sex, Meditation)

  • They say “I love you” everyday and mean it rather than saying it in passing or as a common goodbye parting of sorts.
  • They kiss each other spontaneously and passionately for no reason at all (like about a 6 second kiss).
  • They give each other surprise romantic gifts and compliments on a regular basis.
  • They know what turns their partners on and off erotically. They have a love map of their partners erotic world.
  • Their physically affectionate even in public.
  • They make it a priority to keep playing and having fun together. Fun can usually be the first thing to go as relationships passively head into the future.
  • They cuddle often as cuddle and kissing is the gateway to great sex.
  • They make sex a priority (perhaps scheduling it) and not just by default at the end of the day when all else is done and tiredness sets in.
  • They stay good friends.
  • They can talk comfortably about their sex life.
  • They have weekly romantic dates, and the focus of conversation is most often not on day to day tasks or other practical matters.
  • They take romantic vacations.
  • They turn towards their partners bids or connections (they acknowledge their partner’s communications and respond in an attuned manner to them).


12/17…..The Appendage of Tech to Body or The Appendage of Body to Tech (Found in Save Me From Technology)

—–My realities between real life and tech were becoming skewed.  I didn’t need to live in any one place as I could communicate with my friends and family through email, text messages, social media, etc.  Living in one spot felt inconvenient.  Dedicating to a lover or a few friends in the “physically being with them sense” felt inconvenient, not efficient, and limiting.  My attention span grew less.  My anxieties and depressions increased.  I couldn’t keep from thinking about my digital communications and social media and what I could be doing somewhere else that would make me happy.  I often felt like I was just a fly buzzing around looking for the next poop stimulating adventure.  There was too much distraction constantly swirling around in my head from my tech connections.  I had trouble focusing on anything for too long and would grow impatient constantly and relied often on grandiose ideas that spurred out of nowhere and didn’t really focus on anything but my short-term well-being.  It was harder for me to make new friends as the ease of digital friends and that world was much easier to handle and others were feeling and yearning for that comfort zone too.  I started to feel more stress and anxiety around social situations that resulted in me wanting to take off and go live differently.  And when those social outings went on for too long, anxiety and stress would take over about how I would end these outings and go back to my comfort zone of my social devices and digital world.

If you’re constantly trying to make yourself available to be exposed to people you want to be around, how do you turn it off and ever value people when in fact you are around them?  The urge to connect always to “others” is never ending and it is easy to grow impatient in one’s presence when the looming desire and fantasy of other connections are waiting for you through your devices in social media.  It is as addicting as anything else in our society.  It is taking over our brains and attention and our focus and actually limiting those things too by the obsessive approach to connect with others but not actually really “connecting” with them.  It’s weird.


12/17…..How to Be a Master of Relationship and What Research by John Gottman Shows For Success (Found in Tantra Connection, Sex, Meditation)

  1. Having high expectations for going into relationships and expecting to be treated well with love, affection, kindness, generosity will bring about those things. Having less than high expectations will also bring about less than ideal relationships.
  2. Channeling your anger and resentments in a respectful way is a must. Taking responsibility as the speaker and as the one expressing, for how you come across, is very important.  Masters soften the way they start talking about problems and edit themselves.  They’re considerate, they’re kind and gentle, they take responsibility for even a small part of the problem, overall paying attention to their partners defensiveness which minimizes it.  How the first 3 minutes of a conversation about conflict goes predict with 95% accuracy how the conflict will end up.
  3. A 5 to 1 ratio of positive to negative within a discussion related to conflict. This is how many seconds are dedicated to being nice to each other, being interested, asking questions, being affectionate, empathetic, laughing together, being curious and amused, etc. (positive) to how many seconds they are being hostile, defensive, angry, disappointed and hurt, etc. (negative).  When not in conflict that ratio goes up to 20 to 1!
  4. Except and embrace the differences of your partner but also try to change to become better for yourself and your partner. There needs to be obvious movement in both direction.
  5. Research proves that partners who were in happy relationships received their partners attempts at connection 85% of the time.
  6. If only trying to fix conflict in a relationship, the positive changes won’t last. You have to also fix friendship and intimacy.
  7. Communicate and push for connection about trying to get your needs met in the relationship rather than building resentment and betrayal where your substituting for what’s missing in the relationship and magnifying resentment for what you don’t have rather than gratitude for what you do have.
  8. You will have more sex if it’s positively accepted that it’s ok to say no, while still moving towards wanting to bond in other ways that’ll make connection the focal point. There also needs to be a clear way of saying, ‘yes’ to sex and initiating sex.  Know what turns your partner on and off and put effort into creating a love map of your partners erotic world and continue to invest and participate in it.
  9. In great relationships, the motto of “when you’re hurting baby the world stops and I listen” is adhered to. Really paying attention and being attuned to “taking notes” about what they’re feeling and what their needs are is crucial to keep from a disconnect or neglectful feeling situation from occurring.
  10. Taking up compassionate mindful meditation. Think about feeling yourself in your body and how to increase how compassionate you are.  It moves people away from ruminating on negative things that gets them to withdraw from the world and instead moves them toward engagement with life with curiosity, interest, amusement, and also anger.
  11. Put your effort and energy into relationships that make you a more kind and generous and compassionate person. Walk towards and invest in the kinds of people that make you more adventurous and playful.
  12. There is a three times as high success rate for dealing with relational problems when people do preventative work and they try and prevent problems vs waiting for them to come up.
  13. Conflicts that feel like deal breakers can turn out much of the time to be the greatest potential sources for intimacy as it makes people think about what their position means to them and the history and story behind it all.


12/17…..A Life To Improve  Upon (Found in Recognizing and Dealing with Psychopathic, Sociopathic, Narcissistic Behavior)

  • No longer engaging or participating with people who don’t walk towards improving their own mental health, are largely negative, or exist to damage someone else. You only have a finite amount of energy and these people prove to be incredibly draining.  Most of the time the best course of action is to just STOP interacting with people or situations, especially if they become irrational, combative, aggressive, or manipulating in response.
  • No longer trying to convince everyone to like you and kind of falling in love with the fact that everyone doesn’t.
  • Not subscribing to the idea that pacifying yourself with any form of over-consumption is a viable coping mechanism.
  • Placing self-care on the top of your priority list and being more ambitious about your wellbeing than making other people money.
  • Taking control of your narrative. Correcting people when they misspeak, or have incorrect assumptions about you and your life.
  • Taking responsibility for your life and not playing the victim. No longer sitting by the sidelines waiting for someone else to give you an opportunity or pity you so that you can feed off of their attention.
  • Breaking other people’s expectations. You owe nothing to what other people want and expect you to be. Their perspectives of you are limited and narrow. Conforming to them keeps you small.
  • Not answering texts/personal messages right away. This is not rude, this happens because you need to be a person in the moment sometimes rather than catering to digital conversations.


11/17…..A 35 Year-Old Birthday Self Reflection (Found in Meditation – Positive Processing)

—–Normally I don’t do birthday reflections but 35 is a very symbolic age for me. Particularly because being someone who used to be paid to play sports it was the age that you’d talk about in the way off future for contemplating retirement! Since giving up on my professional athletic pursuits many years ago, I’ve tried heavily to move in a direction in my life that hasn’t focused primarily on my physicality. I always wanted to be defined more than how my body performs, and my physical whims and desires. I wanted to be smarter, more balanced, and able to grasp emotional and intellectual intelligence, as relying on body just seemed shallow overall. However, you grow up knowing and learning and acting in whatever way was exposed to you, and the process over the years can at times be very slow as it’s hard to change directions where your body and mind naturally go for processing and reaction and maturity. Our lives go in direction of various energetic surges and then one day we wake up and think about where we’re at and how that’s either where we want to be or not. I’m happy that I’ve never sold myself out, even though there were moments when I almost didn’t see a way out and had trouble believing in myself, and gave into darkness. I feel like now I can see the horizon of a new level of existence that’s more honed around the deeper, more authentic aspects of life that I feel drawn to and want to incorporate. Trusting your gut instinct and keeping confidence in the dark valleys are hard but they are more likely to land you in eventual good spaces. And most importantly of all, surrounding yourself with positive people and those you admire and who are healthy is the best thing you could ever do. The people you surround yourself with reflect who you are more than most other things. Thank you to all of my friends for being that presence in my life. You know who you are. So here’s to the next era of life where a more authentic, emotionally processed and capable and mature person is trying to vehemently form. This is just the end of the beginning intro to life and not unlike a caterpillar turning into a butterfly. Now let’s swing upside down!


11/17…..The Inevitable Harm of Relationships with Psychopaths, Sociopaths, and Narcissists (Found in Psychopath, Sociopath, Narcissist Behavior)

—–This book is a phenomenal resource for helping victims of intense, psychological relationship abuse.  It is appropriately titled, as women experience way more often than men the ill effects of these relationships.  However, men can easily become victims too and women can just as aggressively display the manipulative traits of the low/no conscience psychopath, sociopath, and narcissist.  They estimate that the victims from psychopathic behavior range in the hundreds of millions in the U.S.  The traits of the psychopath and their victim create for a truly symbiotic abusive and traumatic disaster.  The most common traits of psychopaths include being emotionally unintelligent, juvenile decision making skills, unable to process, being avoidant and devious in communication, using language that is contradictory, lack empathy-conscience-remorse-fear-sadness-disgust.  They have manipulative, dysfunctional and aggravating behavior, are impulsivity with extreme highs and lows, are know-it-alls, lie, create drama and anger, change subjects dramatically, blame, irresponsible and parasitic in behavior, has abandonment issues and acts like a victim, projects behavior on others, causes confusion, gas lights.  Common traits of victims are extraversion in themselves, high excitement seeking, values for relationship investment and being socially positive, sentimentality, attachment, competitiveness, concern and harm avoidance for all, cooperativeness, empathy, tolerance, friendliness, compassion, and supportiveness, believes in miracles, low impulsiveness.  Initially victims were very self-confident, responsible, reliable, resourceful, goal-oriented, un-pretentious, humble, and fulfilled, and self-transcendent.  The professionalism associated with the changing nature of the psychopath to use confusion, manipulations, and your vulnerabilities against you is the very nature of why this is so hard to spot.  They do everything in a low conscious, reactionary state to manipulate power dynamics that favor them in every way while making it seem like they are doing exactly the opposite!


10/17…..Tantra Sex and Emotional Maturity Enlightenment (Found in Tantra Connection, Sex, Meditation)

—–With your partner(s) have you ever discussed why you have sex?  If there were no screens of conditioning to define for us what sex is and why we have it, what would it look like?  Is the ultimate goal to achieve ejaculation; is it to be loved?  Eastern philosophies bring the light of intelligence into sexuality and call it Tantra.  In Western societies, there is no equivalent word as sex is looked upon more in a negative light, mechanical, and unconscious with the intention of ejaculation.  As such, it is goal oriented and often unintentionally stressful with expectations of needing to perform and fulfil a certain sex “role.”  It is hard to find a partner secure and confident enough to go there.  It takes emotional maturity and an ability to be vulnerable and communicative with an act that already is popularly embarrassing and would rather not be talked about, and for most women, might lead to traumatic memories for how men have treated them negatively in a sexual situation.  However, if the both of you (or more!) are lucky you’ll dive beyond the ejaculations, work together to get beyond the traumas, and perhaps look beyond the glass ceiling of popular, mainstream, western love and attachment.  Get beyond commercialized, Viagra obsessed sex and orgasmic based love.  Get beyond not communicating about how to positively enhance sex, love, and connection.  Such non-tantric sex is not bad in itself but to stop there after learning about Tantra is extremely limiting for an intimate relationship and what we can experience.  Many people don’t know that they don’t know that they are stuck at an adolescent minded level pertaining to sex, love, and connection.  The point is to not point fingers or make people think they’re less than as everyone evolves at their own time, but just that the push to become better and attempt time after time is admirable and will lead to good things (not to mention incredibly sexy overall it itself!).  Be afraid to go there and then go anyway.  Embrace the inner adolescent who would learn if they had a positive influence.  Your long run emotional maturation and sexual life will thank you…


10/17…..The Santa Clause Mushroom: A Blunt Day With Amanita Muscaria (Found in Psychedelia / Overall)

—–The medicine was very direct.  It wasn’t filling my mind up with a million things or making me focus solely on something very intensely like what can usually happen with many psychedelics.  It wasn’t a numb feeling, just a nothingness feeling but it wasn’t like I felt like I was focusing on nothing but I guess nothingness was the focus of the plant.  It felt primitive.  It felt connective because of the simplicity.  The normal distractions that fill up my mind weren’t there.  It was easy to not “go there” and I was very much in my body and not in my brain.  It felt relaxing to able to feel this “just being there” feeling.  It felt wonderful to not have my mind racing in a million directions like it can easily do.  It felt great to not have my mind so stimulated like it can be on other psychedelics.  It felt great to be at ease.  The plant was forcing me into ease.  Forcing me into a simpler thought process and a simpler life orientation.


9/17…..Enlightenment Through Breakdown of Body and Tech (Found in Mindful Meditation / Life Balance)

—–The biggest feeling of dread came from having all my pictures and videos gone from my day. I had been posting on all the social networks of Snapchat, Facebook, and Instagram what I was doing, where I had been, and what I was processing. I suddenly felt like nobody would care because they wouldn’t see a blip in their feed. I suddenly actually felt alone and like I hadn’t accomplished anything. I suddenly felt stupid for admitting to myself that I was feeling these things. How was I to go about my life without proving to others what I had done and what was important to me? It was an awkward moment and here I am descending this wonderful mountain in an utterly beautiful setting while suddenly feeling like what I was doing didn’t matter if it’s not expressed through tech.

We think we have these routines and we think we are defined by our bodies, our tech in our phones and social networking, but just like that it could change and we are left with a non-physically capable version of our isolated from tech selves. There really is no right or wrong for following linear positive energy streams that are easy to navigate. How can you really blame ourselves for doing that and wanting and believing in correct paths or answers, or in taking the path of least resistance? If anything, we are a cluster-fuck of energy going in all sorts of directions that have nothing to do with whether we are accepted or judged or however we are presenting ourselves as “living.” How are we really different from the man who is homeless sleeping in the street vs the Buddhist in the mountains vs our avatar on social networking…


9/17…..Dennis McKenna, Psychedelic Fish, and Psilocybin/Magic Mushroom Therapy at Telluride Mushroom Festival (Found in Psychedelia–Psilocybin Mushrooms)

—–The more modern Maslov Hierarchy of Needs has been reorganized in a way that supports magic mushroom psilocybin psychedelic therapy.  Self-actualization used to be at the top of the pyramid but it was replaced by self-transcendence.  In psilocybin therapy, self-transcendence has been seen to be achieved through the PEAK experiences brought on by the psychedelic experience.  It puts a priority at becoming better and catering to something bigger than the individual and how we can relate better to others.  For most of the participants in the study they had a PEAK experience and fell away from the attachment of the illusion of their existing selves and emotionally processed in a way that led to authentic, positive change in a new re-organized direction.


7/17…..Casual Psychedelic-er: A Day With San Pedro Cactus (Found in Psychedelia–San Pedro)

—–Looking down upon the tiny little beings of the human race really humbles humanity.  How are we any different than any other living thing that’s just going about its day?  We live in this infinite, massive, expansive universe and it is often so easy to feel like we are at the center of it all.  We clearly are not, and although it is wise to have an insight of your ego and how you affect the world there is clearly a billion times more things that don’t involve you.  We should not so easily get lost within ourselves being the center of the universe.  It is a balancing act for sure but a lot of depression and stress and angst and anxiety in the modern human, especially the American, is a result of this imbalance and us taking too personally everything that’s happening in our lives.  It is really not all about us, but likewise, we have to be happy with ourselves before we can be happy with what’s around us.  You see, it’s not the easiest pickle to figure out.

What I’ve learned to love about psychedelic medicine and the San Pedro in this situation is how non-ordinary states of consciousness can be a positive force for living and dealing with ordinary states of “normal” day to day consciousness.  Our brains need stimulation in non-ordinary ways too no different than our bodies need it and why we do workouts that cater to different muscles not too much used, which we then are sore from.  If we are in an emotionally good place then we ARE in a good place.  Emotional health is everything and contrary to popular belief regarding whatever politicians and laws tell us regarding the “War on Drugs,” psychedelics can dramatically benefit emotional well-being and leave us in a very healthy, light, calm, loving, accepting, efficient, and connective place.


6/17…..Mega Doses of the Utah Desert and LSD (Found in Psychedelia–LSD)

—–During these first few hours every thought that is thought seems of absolute magnitude.  It all seems so important and so meaningful and you’re thinking about things in ways you feel like you never have before, or it’s been very long since you have.  The glee and joy and fascination of a child seems to come back to you.  You find everything interesting.  You find everything motivating.  You want to uncover and figure out everything.  You have raw powerful energy.  Your brain is literally on display.  What makes you human and a part of nature is being defined to you and it is the most fascinating thing ever.  You feel grateful for the experience.  How have you forgotten about such things?  How have you ever veered from these magical insights and thoughts?  How could you not have motivation and empowerment for everything you see all the time?  The world can be such a wonderful place.  Laughing takes over as it seems like some weird joke you play on yourself for somehow not experiencing life as it can be…


—–Acceptance and reciprocity of intersectionality of thought is a means to an end to a true pursuit of happiness and healthy communities.


3/17…..Ecology and Conversation on Veganism, Thoughts About Life and Attachment and Remaining Open in Times of Posturing (found in Conscious, Ethical Vegans, Omnivores, Environmentalists)

—–People take on and become an –ism WAY more than an –ism becomes a piece of them (Vegan-ism in this example). People become ego identified with their -ism and due to this it seeks out and looks for division and opportunities to spread the agenda and to judge negatively if agreement doesn’t adhere to said –ism. Most of the time, it directly leads to quick division and forces sides to be taken and more conveniently puts people in boxes that really are far from defining them.  It leaves bystanders feeling attacked when someone from that –ism starts to express themselves. When people feel attacked, they feel defensive, and when people feel defensive they don’t want to look at those issues. This is a lose lose situation as we are social apes and opportunities that are lost that relate to influencing and being influenced is a big losing venture for all. 

In a very real sense, every –ism is a form of authoritarian-ism. If we really want people to come around to our –ism it needs to come from a place of freedom, dialogue, reciprocal communication about values and experiences, etc. And we also need to be honestly open to that our –ism may be wrong! We can’t be offended and grotesque feeling if people don’t agree with us. That will just lead to us spending more time within our echo chamber groups and our echo chamber heads. This usually does not pan out well for people and gives people a distorted view of reality…


3/17…..Vegan, Anti-allergy, Gluten Free, with Less Sugar, Cake and Frosting! (Found in Superfoods / Eating the Right Foods)

—-Not exactly a superfood but it is a choice desert for someone avoiding the 8 most common allergens and having somewhat less sugar.  We all need to figure out how to appease our sweet tooth ya know:)


3/17…..Making Perfect Green Smoothies and Info on Juicing (Found in Food as Medicine / Medicine as Food and Superfoods / Eating the Right Foods)

—–I’m so into smoothies! It’s like the gift that keeps giving in wonderful options for taste and excellent health.

An excellent documentary on the health benefits of juices and smoothies is called “Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead” on Netflix, about a man who was really unhealthy and on tons of pharmaceutical medication, and then decided to start juicing which led to his astounding health.


2/17…..Mushroom Healing Insights (Found in Psilocybin Mushrooms)

—–I started to examine a tree that shimmered due to the rain that had just passed. I talked about how I felt like most people (including myself) were just trying to work through the muck of daily routine for the few blissful and beautiful moments that seemed too few and far between. I didn’t want life to be like this! I wanted beauty, I wanted transformation, I wanted growth! I didn’t want to continue to be stifled the way I felt I was, but could see no other way around it due to having to make money, having to work and having to go to college so I could wrap myself up into debt so that I could just get a career. How was I supposed to find what I wanted out of life when I had to put so much energy into things that didn’t seem like they mattered?


2/17…..Social Media and Facebook “Lurking” Disease (Found in Save Me From Technology)

—-“Lurking” on social media without directly getting involved with people or actions or issues is a problem for many people.  Avoiding “lurking” and taking breaks from social media are researched to bring people back to a positive space with their lives and how they view themselves.

Various groups are trying to use social networking to map the patterns and behavior of a person’s social connectivity and take the happiness pulse of the entire planet, so it can detect red flags for a person’s, a society’s, emotional well-being.  Will we one day receive medical prescribed social networking notifications that diagnose us with depression, anxiety, insecurity, over stress, addiction, suicide tendencies, narcissism, withdrawing from friends/family and overall mental health monitoring?  Seems like it’s only a matter of time and can you imagine the kind of world this would bring about?  A whole plethora of positives and negatives come to mind for mapping the norms of happiness that could be so easily measured by our government, companies, ourselves, etc.


2/17…..What Do I Want To Struggle For? (Found in Mindful Meditation / Life Balance)

—-…It is interesting to ask the question of not what will make us happy but what struggle will give us extra motivation.  Life can be a hodge-podge of things we attach meaning to, dreams gone astray, or change and loss being inevitable parts of our existence.  It’s often hard to find the motivation for things but when you grow from struggle and actually realize you might have enjoyed that process then that’s where you really found a true passion.

1/17…Engaging in Something Bigger Than Ourselves (Found in Positive Processing / Landmark)

—-We often think of “I” as that which goes on with us internally with our attitudes, moods, feelings, emotions, thoughts, bodily sensations, etc.  We can also think of “I” through a filter of some theory, idea, memory, belief, etc. Being limited by either of those default places we associate with “I” doesn’t allow us to investigate the full potential available in being human both internally and externally.  We want to be a powerful “I” that encompasses all and can grasp what we originally considered to be out of our reach.  We want to expand upon the whole world in a different way.  We want to get out of our “default orientation” so that we illuminate, vs. limit, what we encounter day to day.


12/16…Unattachment in Love Leading to Healthy, Expansive, Empowering Love (Found in Wellness Coaching–Positive Processing)

—-Unattachment in love is purely the ability to love someone freely. Both people are able to come and go at will, without ever feeling like there is an expectation for a specific set of behaviors or timelines.  Communication and expression and holding space and intersecting your empowered life with your partner’s empowered life and moving on from there is the foundation of unattachment love.

In order to truly love someone this way we have to first name and sit with our wounds; our fear of abandonment, rejection and whatever else we have been conditioned, since birth, to expect from a relationship. Once we can do this work for ourselves, it doesn’t suddenly end, but rather becomes easier to navigate unattachment.  We understand that our feelings don’t have to do with the other person, but with ourselves.

Unattachment simply means that we are choosing to love in a mindful way.


11/16…San Pedro Cactus Brew.  Using Medicinal Plants to Take Charge of Your Own Healing (Found in Plant Teacher Healing-San Pedro)

–—People commonly use San Pedro Cactus to confront a variety of ailments. These ailments include approaching anxiety, depression, addiction, trauma, stress, in a different, communicative, and efficient way. The medicine is used with intention setting to positively increase empathy, one’s connection to the world, one’s connection to oneself and others. It is used to tap into one’s life meaning and fulfillment and purpose and allows one to process more efficiently whatever it is that is on the mind and also things that weren’t realized were on the mind.

—-Bad things happen in the world.  Good people are getting hurt that are standing for peace and it makes our hearts hurt and heavy.  We can internalize this and become our supposed ‘enemy’ and become tempted to adhere to hatred, fear, and anger, but does this actually serve us?  It may seem so in that short term moment as intense, negative feelings are easy to grab onto and exercise and feel powerful with, but ultimately it will turn us into what we hate and the cycle will forever fester within itself, ourselves, and only be perpetuated.  Do we want to be possessed by such things, by emotions, and especially by these types of negative, short term reactionary feelings?  How will that affect those and everything in your life around you?  What kind of energy do you want to be spreading and influencing others with?
10/16…Living Powerfully and Learning to Unlearn in Relationship with Others and Yourself (Found in Wellness Coaching–Positive processing)
 —-We often gravitate towards things in relationships not because it’s what we want but because it’s what we’re used to. It’s part of the struggle of maturing and adapting and overcoming our pasts and actually learning how to stand for our empowered selves and who we actually want to be in the present and future. It’s part of learning how to unlearn. What would our personality actually look like if we didn’t have years of defense mechanisms built up that eventually evolved into our actually personality? What would that personality actually attract in people?…

10/16…Psychedelic Healing.  MAPS, Zendo Project Love (Found in Psychedelia–Overall)

—-Working and doing so much work in the Zendo this summer has really taught me a lot about the true nature of harm reduction and what people need in their lives. When people become a guest of the Zendo they are overwhelmed. Many guests are not actually on psychedelics and realize that the Zendo is a safe space for coming forth with whatever is on their mind. Most guests, however, are and the experience of being on them creates an overwhelming situation within their minds and bodies that need to be expressed and let out. Contrary to the person who walked in who had taken nothing, the person on psychedelics has way less control over what is coming forth within them. They are in an altered state and this state is forcing them to go within and confront all the things that have been brewing in them for a long time. If this person is not allowed to process in a safe space the situation could be negative for themselves, others, the community, etc. The feelings, emotions, thoughts, etc. that are normally easier to control for the person who is not on psychedelics is almost impossible to control for the person who is on them. They can easily fall victim to all these suddenly overpowering thoughts and feelings and maybe even hurt themselves, others, get arrested, ruin their time, embarrass themselves, generally land themselves in a lot of trouble, etc. That’s where the Zendo and the people working it display magic. It allows time for people to interact with these feelings in a zone where they will be safe, not judged, and cared for with people who will mostly just listen, mirror conversation coming at them, and possibly offer gentle guidance. It is a remarkable process and place to be where difficult experiences that could have easily been negative are transformed into challenging then transformed into positive. It is truly a wonderful wellness experience.


10/16…The Healthy Nomad (Found in Food as Medicine / Medicine as Food)
—-Whenever possible try to offset by buying juices, smoothies (try to always keep it more veggie based), and salads whenever you can. I plan my stops on the road with where I can get these. If nothing else Starbucks usually has at least one of these things. Taco Bell surprisingly has a lot of Vegan products as well that you can request and vegetarian/vegan Subway options is never the worst given the usually nil options of the U.S. road trip. The foods I recommend here will keep your baseline and body’s energy infrastructure operating in a balanced way where you’ll be able to tap into high energy levels during very physically demanding scenarios. It’ll definitely get a bit old eating a lot of the prepared things I bring with me on such trips, especially if you’re on a long trip but just remember that the counter to this is eating whatever you come across on the road which will be guaranteed to make you feel like shit and nutritionally depleted/malnourished, thus making it so you can’t enjoy yourself to the maximum possible level. Food is fuel and how are you going to fuel your body? We all know how easy it is to go the route of not thinking about it. That doesn’t work. Never again! Avoid avoid avoid! Have a thought process about it. Create some positive intentions. Enjoy yourself more, get more accomplished in work and play, and make others around you enjoy you too, all while being nice to the environment. Win win win:):):)
9/16…Brain Sex From Burning Man. Words We Should Be Saying More to Ourselves And Each Other (Found in Wellness Coaching–Positive Processing)
—-The ability to feel my heart expand and then contract, followed directly by the fear that it will never expand again. Oh to be human is such a tender experience! I chose, and I continue to choose, consciously, purposefully, and on purpose to remain open. To remain fully alive and present in every moment, expanded or contracted, and feel the multi layered expression of how this existence affects me, and mine upon it. My wish is that every expansion and contraction of my being be greater and push my parameters always and ever onward, and please, with grace!
9/16…The Limits of Who and What We Know Ourselves to Be (Found in Positive Processing/Landmark)
—-Options are mostly familiar, foreseeable and fall within our known expectations and are essentially forecasts based on our past interpretations. In this way, they are not exactly options but repetitions in disguise from our past leaving us with our old interpretations determining our future. True option and “choice” is another matter as being able to create is a profound human ability.

Original Landmark passage can be found here…


8/16…Burning Man! Burn It Down, Build It Up, Build Your Brain, Bring Your Heart (Found in Holistic Health–Overall and in Wellness Coaching–Life Balance)

—-It takes actions and little steps of moving forward to live your truths to actually create new levels of healthy routines, thoughts, perspectives, brain neurons, etc. And then of course, there is the idea that we will never be free or rid of the process of expanding. It will perpetually be in motion and growth is often an uncomfortable experience. We suffer without perspective as we can’t really see where that growth is moving towards yet. It takes time and patience before we start to get some perspective for our suffering and then at that point it’s off to the races and re-birth is something we can see and feel. However, even with re-birth, it is just a temporary stop in the repeating cycle. We won’t get to some magical place and then sit down and say, “Well, we made it” enough expansion for me and glad that’s over. When you’re on the right path there will be moments of extreme accomplishment and seeing/feeling that, but then it becomes relative and you continue to move forward to the next growth. There is no magic pill, magic place, magic partner, magic job, magic food, magic workout routine that will relieve us forever. We will constantly go in cycles of angst, suffering, hating life, perseverance, trust in the process, rebirth, flourishing and then various cycles of that all over again. It is a marathon race of constant movement. It’s a lifestyle approach and when your habits and thoughts take on this reality, and dips and spikes are all balanced out and work off of each other and seen as leading to eventual growth, you are nicer to yourself.


8/16…Telluride Mushroom Festival Day 2: Science of Psilocybin and Following the Money in Pharmaceuticals (Found in Psychedelia–Psilocybin Mushrooms)

—-One of the blatant inconsistencies of our countries drug policies is how fearful we have become of illegal drugs that rarely harm us and lead to deaths vs the legal prescription drugs that cause immeasurable daily suffering.  Hundreds of thousands of people die a year from ordered and directed use of prescribed pharmaceuticals and hundreds of thousands more suffer immensely from other ailments from the same drugs.  Homeopathic drugs don’t cater to these atrociously negative statistics.  The trust and reliance our culture at large has for big pharma is appalling as we take for granted that we are a culture addicted to prescription drugs, somehow being different than being addicted to the much lower and less harmful substances of illegal drugs.  We are vastly over medicated.  70% of the world’s psychotropic drugs and 80% of the world’s OxyContin is consumed in the U.S.  These are outrageously horrible numbers and will make our culture one day remembered for casually having a serious epidemic addiction problem that we simply went along with.


8/16…Telluride Mushroom Festival: Psychedelic Mushrooms Won’t Rot Your Brain But Rather Do the Opposite (Found in Psychedelia–Mushrooms)

—-The main region of the brain that creates new neurons and a positive environment for adult neurogenesis to flourish is the hippocampus. Newly published studies are claiming that psilocybin/magic mushrooms, cannabis, lsd, dmt, and mescaline boost adult neurogenesis while heroine, morphine, amphetamines, cocaine, alcohol, nicotine all reduce it. Specifically, for this talk, the ingredient in magic mushrooms, psilocybin, was shown to lead to growth in brain cells. Mice and rats were experimented on and brain functioning and processing and growth was compared with mice and rats with those who were not given psilocybin. For all levels of doses being micro, low, medium, and high the brain capacity of mice improved more with mice who were giving psilocybin. They learned tasks quicker, they didn’t succumb to fear or harmful situations as easily, and they displayed more energy. And what’s even more striking is that the mice and rats who were given micro to low doses had the most brain growth and positive effects than even the mice given medium to high doses.

Psilocybin creates adult neurogenesis by acting on serotonin receptors in the brain. Magic mushrooms also have endocannabinoids in them but no receptor for them (specifically the truffles which are basically the mycelium roots of mushrooms). Their intention is for them to be eaten by animals that spread their spores. Animals that have endocannabinoid receptors (humans) eat them and melanin is produced which has a calming, relaxing affect. We have a natural symbiotic relationship to eat magic mushrooms as we spread their spores and consequently help our brains grow more neurons and feel more relaxed. Win win much?


8/16…Attuned to Being a Feminist Man (Found in Crisis Support and Organization–Trauma)

—-We live in a largely misogynist American culture and world that very commonly hates, distrusts, harasses, and looks at women as objects. Sadly, social norms cater to these views and many men impose such views often very directly and aggressively, and women who are trained in such ways as well by the misogynist norms, can impose them with equal effectiveness passively. How are we to know what to do about this with no education, no leadership, no vulnerability, no reaction, no conversation? Left to our own devices we will most often not end up as attuned feminist adults, even though we may think we are. How do we know how to name it when it happens and how do we know how to talk to people about it in ways that won’t cater to backlash when it comes up?

Becoming attuned to be a feminist man starts with other men and how they relate to each other. For men, a good place to start is eye contact. Men easily cater to communicating with one another mediated through a ‘man box.’ This involves barely making eye contact and when they do it is a brief sideline contact with the rest of the body in a flight-or-fight mode. This makes the eyes and body language say, ‘I’m really not connecting, I’m really not vulnerable, I’m really not fully here.’ Men don’t want to be seen looking, they don’t want to be exposed for caring. Their brains are leading them to a place that caters to the easiest way out. Men have been trained to do this.

What do women really want and need? They need help in repairing the harm of misogyny and don’t want to be stigmatized. Be the man that can give them a different kind of experience than the men who have harmed them. If this is difficult then go forth and take on that inner work. Own and recognized where gaps might be occurring and how your own approaches to social norms and ego and sexual/relationship power dynamics might be involved. As a man, make it clear that this issue overall is yours and many men’s responsibility to work on and not a failing problem in women or ‘others’ in general.


8/16…The difference Between Being Happy and Being High (Found in Psychedelia-Overall)

—-Consider two groups of characters: a monk or hermit who takes a vow of poverty and spends years in silent meditation or even a self-indulgent mountain climber set on climbing Everest, and a homeless person who supports a crack habit while doing no harm to others in pursuit of that high, or even a compulsive gamer living in their parent’s basement could be used here too.

The monk is seen as holy and dedicated to a meaningful life and the climber seen as giving it his all, while the other two more likely to be regarded as sick, or even worthless. All of them, however, are not raising children or doing productive economic or artistic work during the hours they engage in their obsessions.  They are all, generally, searching for meaning or relief from life’s stresses.

Should we let meditators or climbers off the hook simply because they believe their pursuit is praiseworthy, cool, or effort based?  If the meditator is so calm that they wouldn’t flinch from a gunshot going off, is being that disconnected from shared reality really something to value?  Or perhaps the climber who is physically disconnecting himself from reality?  Is it not more important to consider whether people are left more open to the world and integrated as a people or shut down and left fractured by whatever action they choose to participate in?

A high percentage of users of one class of psychedelic substances like LSD, mescaline, ayahuasca and psilocybin (“shrooms”) describe their experiences as being meaningful in ways that are quite different from how we typically talk about alcohol and other drugs.  Even after a terrifying or apparently self-dissolving psychedelic experience, many people find that psychedelics have taught them something important. The fact that the teacher here is chemical is less important than the fact that growth and learning occur.

If we look at whether pleasures allow us to grow and connect, or if they simply take us out of ourselves, we’re better equipped to understand their value.  No one can be always “on,” and simply zoning out on something isn’t always wrong. But psychedelics are different from other drugs in that they frequently make us face aspects of ourselves we might prefer to ignore. This could be one reason they are rarely addictive.  The more habit-forming drugs like heroin, coke and alcohol (even TV) all tend to allow the user to escape from unwanted thoughts and emotions. Psychedelics, instead, tend to concentrate people on them.

Americans have probably also tended to be skeptical of unearned pleasure for spiritual reasons.  The Puritan in them can’t value it without effort or worthiness, and if blessings are simply experienced rather than earned, and feelings are just chemicals moving about in the brain, it’s easy to start questioning whether anything matters.  Psychedelics make people uncomfortable because they raise images of the homeless crack addict above and don’t have the work and effort symbolism of the climber or meditator attached.  Psychedelics are godlike in their ability to change our minds, feel connected and integrated to the world, and have us see new pathways.  That is revolutionary, as well as a threat, to the status quo.

If we want a better 21st century drug policy, we need to grapple with what drug experience means and not simply assume that a drug is a drug is a drug, and that being high is always worthless and inevitably leads to unhappiness in the end.


7/16…Stability with Addiction Using Harm Reductionism and Microdosing (Found in Harm Reductionism)

—-The thought was that if we could stabilize the craziness of their lives, the day that begins with the search for alcohol and all the complications that occur with that, then maybe we could make inroads with their mental health, addiction to alcohol and their physical illnesses.

Lifelong alcoholics are also an enormous drain on public resources.  The city of Ottawa has saved millions of dollars with such approaches to alcohol as there has been a huge reduction in 911 calls, hospital emergency visits, paramedic and police encounters, etc.

At exactly half past the hour, what’s known as ‘the pour’ begins. A measure of Californian white wine at 13% alcohol is measured out. The wine is then dispensed to the alcoholics. For the first pour at 730am, most residents get a kickstarter of 7oz – nearly 200ml. For the rest of the day until 9.30pm, they are given 5oz, just over 140ml.

“I’d love them all to be abstinent,” says Dr Turnbull. “But is that feasible or possible? Perhaps not. These people are stable in here.  They’re happy, and they have a reasonable standard of living.”

Full article can be read here at


7/16…..The Cultural Trance of Everyday Experience vs Emotional Healing (Found in Wellness Coaching/Crisis Support and Organization–Mindful Meditation/Life Balance AND Holistic Health/Plant Teacher Healing/Psychedelia–Overall)

—-It’s not necessarily going against our brain that is the solution but in giving our brain back it’s freedom. It’s finding some sort of enduring energy pathway that will deliver us from a river of narrow thought that usually dries up in some desert somewhere to instead delivering us to the expansive ocean of experience.
It is interesting to observe what happens to our bodies when we encounter fear. We emotionally and physically become inflamed. If we go to the doctor we are prescribed a cure. If we don’t then we apply our own cure. Both usually involve short term numbing of the pain. The numbing makes it easy to continue to participate in doing things we’ve always done; watching tv, drinking or using drugs to oblivion, scrolling through facebook or tinder, having jobs or relationships that don’t serve us, having the same conversations you know the outcomes to, having the same friends you’ve always had, relying on safety and security and comfort over vulnerability, not growing overall, etc.

Ups are no problem but the downs can be devastating where we freak out, get injured, crack and will do anything to get back to that comfortably place before we were hurt. Yes, getting hurt sucks but not getting hurt sucks even more if you were to look at your life as a whole.
Mostly people think their problems can only be made better by more complicated solutions because we think we are complicated people so easier solutions go overlooked or are not exciting enough, hence following into the cultural trance of what healing ‘should’ look like. One never likes to tell people that they’re starting this new, cool therapy and it’s called ‘sleep and eating well.’ So unsexy.
Left to our own mental devices we are much more negative to ourselves than we would be to anyone else. We are our worst enemy and we need ways to not let our overly critical internal dialogues take over.

7/16…..Tough vs Stupid Tough. Energy Balance and Efficiency (Found in Save Me From Technology and Wellness Coaching–Mindful Meditation / Life Balance)

—-Why can’t we be tougher, more resilient and determined in our work so we can accomplish all of our goals? The problem is partly that we often put too much on our plate for our goals.  We say ‘yes’ way too much.  We expect an unrealistic amount of accomplishment from ourselves (an expectation that we would in no way hold for others) and are constantly distracted from social networking and technology to move and take on the next thing from the infinite source of information (The average person engages with their phone 150 times a day. If every distraction took only 1 minute, which would be seriously optimistic, that would account for 2.5 hours of every day).  However, what is even more at play than our distracted lives and busy schedules is a misunderstanding of what it means to be tough, resilient, and overworked.

We often sacrifice sleep, eating well, love, etc. in the name of productivity, but ironically with our loss of such things, despite the extra hours we spend ‘working’, adds up to lots of inefficient, stressful, and wasteful hours.  And just because work stops, doesn’t mean we are recovering. We very often ‘stop’ work but then spend the night wrestling with solutions to work problems, talking about our work over dinner, and falling asleep thinking about how much work we’ll do tomorrow (and by the way, ‘work’ can mean anything that’s causing one stress and anxiety and where one’s mind doesn’t ever leave from).

A resilient and tough person is a well-rested one. When an exhausted individual goes out into their day they risk hurting everyone on the road with impaired driving, they don’t have the cognitive resources to do as well at their jobs, they have lower self-control with friends and family, they are moody, bitter and less capable of love, affection, and connection. Overworking and exhaustion is a romanticized notion that you are actually doing a good job.  In reality, most of us don’t have to do this to ourselves to survive and is the opposite of resilience and what I like to call ‘stupid tough.’  The key to resilience is trying really hard, then stopping, recovering, and then trying really hard again…

7/16…..Acceptance in Relationships.  Using Psychedelic Healing Therapy Models for our Everyday Lives (Found in Plant Teacher Healing / Psychedelia–Overall)

—-For people to be most helpful to one another, it is important to have travelled their own path with careful diligence and arrived at a state of compassion that gives one knowledge that we are all here to help one another in our own search for our own truth.

How do we become ‘stabilized’ in an ego-free state where we are most receptive to tracking the voyage of another and be in a state of consciousness where transcending one’s own ego boundaries and tapping into the consciousness of another and knowing where they are coming from is more possible?

As individuals learn to sit in a state of total self-acceptance they automatically accept everyone else without reservations. When one holds reservations about another’s acceptability, one automatically rejects the other. What makes this all so difficult is the difference between experiencing phenomena vs only having intellectual beliefs about them. The greatest obstacle to knowing something is to think you know it before you actually have the experience of the phenomenon.  Reservations we hold over people in deeming them acceptable are very often coming from thought as opposed to experience.

It is of titanic importance in relationship building to uncover what “agendas” each person has for the other.  When we have an agenda for someone it pretty much always means we are not accepting them as they are in present-time state. Regardless of the “realities and niceties and positive intentions” of our agendas, the result is that we are not accepting the individual “as is.”

One of the strongest forces in creating a positive shift in an individual’s experience of themselves is to have them experience being totally accepted by another…

5/16…If You Care About The Planet, It’s Better to Eat a Salad in a Prius Than a Burger in a Prius (Found in Vegnism / Environmentalism)

—–Lab Grown Burgers

Technology vs. Animal Cruelty

The quote in the title is from Bill Maher.  Below is a summation of the two excellent articles posted above related to lab-grown meat having a dramatically positive effect on environmentalism.

Lab-grown meat can reduce land use by 99.7%, drain 84% fewer gallons of water and reduce greenhouse gas emissions by 98.8%.

No matter the news on health and environmental outcomes, most people are still going to want to eat a burger. So why not try to make sure that the meat we do eat has as little environmental impact as possible?

The trick is to harvest stem cells from the muscle of a live cow or pig and turn them loose in the right environment in a lab.  A single stem cell can generate a hundred trillion cells of meat. So, from a small number of donor animals, we can ultimately get our burgers, chops, and chicken tenders without harm to the cows, pigs, or chickens.

What does the world look like right now?  Every year, farmers raise and slaughter some 77 billion animals for food. That’s 10 animals per person. With a billion or two more of us on the planet by 2050, and with rising incomes allowing a greater appetite for meat, that number could expand. Perhaps even to 200 billion, if China and other populous nations start eating as much meat as Americans do.  We cannot go there and expect to preserve our water, soil, forests, grains, and Earth as a whole.

Given time, we might even be able to fulfill a promise made by none other than Winston Churchill. In 1931, Churchill predicted that we would one day “escape the absurdity of growing a whole chicken in order to eat the breast or wing, by growing these parts separately under a suitable medium.”

5/16…How the Bacteria in Our Gut Influences Our Minds (Found in Food as Medicine / Medicine as Food)

—–“…The symbiotic relationship between our gut health and how we feel is a hot topic of discussion and research. Scientists, physicians, and mental health practitioners are increasingly aware of the important relationship between the balance of “critters” in our gut and how we experience our brain, mood and emotions.

From a holistic vantage point our gut is known as the “second brain” and there are structural/anatomical reasons for this reference. The “second brain,” known scientifically as the enteric nervous system, consists of sheaths of neurons located in the walls of our gut. We refer to these sheaths as the vagus nerve and it runs from our esophagus to our anus, roughly nine meters long.

Due to the interconnectedness of our brain and enteric nervous system, via the vagus nerve, once our gut bacteria is out of whack, we are vulnerable to a pattern of emotional discomfort, usually marked by increasing episodes of anxiety and depression…”

5/16…A Vegan Diet Feeding The Whole World While Causing Zero Deforestation (Found in Vegan Good Times / Environmentalism)

—–“A new study published in Nature Communications, has put hundreds of ideas on the table. The goal of the study, led by researchers at the Institute for Social Ecology in Vienna, was to find ways to meet the global food demand in the year 2050. And as if that wasn’t a big enough challenge, they set out to meet that demand without without sacrificing any forest — a zero deforestation plan.”

4/16…The Scientific Based Healing Benefits of LSD (Found in Holistic Health / Plant Teacher Healing / Psychedelia–LSD)

—-“The Beckley/Imperial Research Programme hope these collective findings may pave the way for these compounds being one day used to treat psychiatric disorders. They could be particularly useful in conditions where negative thought patterns have become entrenched, say the scientists, such as in depression or addiction.

Dr Carhart-Harris explained: Normally our brain consists of independent networks that perform separate specialized functions, such as vision, movement and hearing — as well as more complex things like attention. However, under LSD the separateness of these networks breaks down and instead you see a more integrated or unified brain.”

4/16…Stop Putting Harmful Ingredients Into Your Body Through Your Sweat Glands With Common Deodorants (Found in Holistic Health / Plant Teacher Healing / Psychedelia)

—-I was extremely cynical when my brother recommended me to try the paste. It sat on my shelf for months and then one day I tried it. Upon trying it for the first time I swore that I would never use it again as I really don’t like armpits and in order to apply it, if you only have the jar of paste, is by putting it on your fingers and rubbing it lightly into your arm pit. Yuck, I don’t ever want to touch my armpits and actually have had a weird phobia in the past of sharing deodorants (weirdly, I’d rather share a toothbrush than a deodorant)…

4/16…Anti-Cancer Essential Oils (Found in Holistic Health / Plant Teacher Healing)

—-The wonderful world of anti-cancer plants!

2/16…Passive Activisim.  Environmentalism and Banking.  Use (Found in Environmentalism and Vegan Good Times)

—-Banking in this way, is part of the lifestyle switch that a new generation of people are bringing to the world. Do we want to invest in our communities or in high risk speculative trading on Wall Street? The choice is ours and if we want to live in a better world we will by pass the big banks and invest our money in entities that have the interest of the people in mind.

2/16…LSD Both Mimics Psychosis and Improves Mental Health (Found in Holistic Health / Plant Teacher Healing / Psychedelia)

—-“It would be wrong to oversell the relationship between the psychedelic state and psychosis, because equally in the acute psychedelic state, there can be an amazing clarity,” Carhart-Harris noted. “People can have genuine insights.”

2/16…Linear thinking vs Stan Grof, Holotropic Breathwork and Inducing Psychedelic States (Found in Trauma)

—-…our consciousness is not from our brain. There is no observable evidence that explains even why or how or if even in fact our own consciousness exists. It is a part of the universe that is flowing through the brain and providing us with a vision of how the universe is developing and also showcasing that the universe is happening just as much within us internally. The ordinary state brain is an incredible reducing valve, far from giving us a full dimension of being…

2/16…Trauma, Transcendence, and the Birth Prenatal Matrix (Found in Trauma)

—-…How do we get ourselves to a place where our suffering comes with a hint of perspective that can lead us to re-birth and transcended into a new being moving on from things that held us back before? The source of trauma can be long lived and have its effects on us forever until once again we are forced into another realm with death. Do we really want to wait that long? To be forced yet again by an unknown hand or mother to move on to the next world? That is not the only option. We can have more control than we think…

1/16…LSD Creativity Battling Depression (Found in Depression)

—-The medicine allows for me to feel as if I create my own maze in my daily life. What do I wake up and subject myself to in order to succumb to the pressure of feeling that I need to do this or have to do that? I’m not saying this feeling is altogether horrible but when it’s taken out of balance and that’s all you’re exposed to day after day it can easily have negative affects. We are capable of breaking out of these depressing routines and LSD brings us back to a balanced state by being exposed to looking at the world in a fundamentally different way…

1/16…Stress and Body, Lecture 1 (Found in Stress)

—-The solution to avoiding chronic stress is not exactly in the homeostasis of balancing out one part of the body but in the allostasis response of balancing out the whole body. If you get stressed like a normal mammal, you better be capable of turning on your stress response to deal with it. If you get stressed like a psycho-socially, sophisticated, human being, you are constantly going to be paying the price of dealing with chronic stress being activated. It is as human as cooked food.

1/16…Brain Food and Power! (Found in Superfoods / Eating the Right Foods)

—-Short and sweet!  What better part of your body to try to cater to than your brain.  I don’t think Donald Trump uses any of these:)

12/15…Addiction and Sex and Ejaculatory Release (Found in Addiction)

–The release?  Why is this so important.  Well imagine what release means when the common person thinks about coming home from a long day of duties or work.  They sit down and watch tv and let it think and talk for them, they have a drink or many (alcohol).  They might eat their favorite snack.  I would say probably something usually with sugar in it.  They might overeat at a meal.  They might over-train in the gym.  They might take some pain killers or other prescriptions drugs to help them relax or sleep.  For the more illegal drug user, they’ll come home and take a huge bong rip of cannabis.  They’ll inject themselves with some heroine or prefer to take any other form that creates a “release” type feeling that they think about all day and salivatingly look forward to.  It’s what gets them through their day that they can look forward to the release.  Sounds all too easy and all too much of a practical solution.  However, unintended consequences arise.

11/15…Tobacco/Nicotine: The, I guess if you like something enough you eventually put it up your butt, drug (Found in Holistic Health / Plant Teacher Healing)

—-The poison path with plants is explored.  Therapeutic applications and dangers of tobacco.

11/15…..Celebrating “Lisa the Vegetarian,” the Simpsons episode that changed the image of vegetarians on TV (Found in Vegan Good Times / Environmentalism

—-I think the part of that Simpsons episode that makes the most sense is when Homer is trying to poke holes in Lisa’s vegetarianism argument by saying, “Lisa, it’s a lamb, not a LAMB!” How many of us would eat animal products if we in fact had to watch, or better yet, do the slaughtering of the animals? A living creature not wanting to die or a product we buy at the store; a cow or a COW. If we could kill animals, couldn’t we in essence kill humans as well? Humans have rights and can communicate with one another so that’s out of the question but animals don’t have that luxury in a spoken word sense. Does this constitute as Specie-ism? Will we one day in the future scoff at how we treated and slaughtered animals in the past much in the same way we view the history of enslaving Africans in the present day? Racism? Specie-ism? What is the difference? Small steps are needed towards breaking tradition and achieving a diet and overall lifestyle built around kindness? What kind of effects would that have on our society? Our world? Imagine the possibilities and how choosing to live in a less cruelty filled world would positively affect everything!

11/15…..A quick summation on where the food industry is going in terms of creating lab grown meat. (Found in Vegan Good Times / Environmentalism)

—-Watch the video above.  It is extremely informative about the potential for creating a world with less cruelty towards animals, using the Earth’s resources most efficiently, all while getting the same nutritional content of meat.  The future is upon us!

10/15…..Great article on the benefits of superfoods. (Found in Superfoods / Eating the Right Foods)

—-The article focuses on aloe vera, bee pollen, maca, reishi mushrooms, goji berries, chlorella, hemp, and coconut.  I would also include coconut oil, cacao nibs, spirulina, blueberries, acai powder, other mushrooms like shiitake and maitake, avocados.  Try to find ways to get these in your meals.  Most easily can be put into breakfast bowls or on salads.  Any additional super food in your diet will only improve your well-being:)

10/15…..Mindful Meditation with Ronald D. Siegel, Lecture 1 (Found in Mindful Meditation)

—-So what is mindfulness? The wonderful easy summation is the awareness of the present experience with acceptance. It is being aware, paying attention, and remembering to be aware and to pay attention. We need to develop the intention to pay attention as much as possible and to focus on being non-judgmental (most importantly to ourselves) and totally present and accepting.

10/15…..Eating Daily Turmeric Does Wonders For Your Body (Found in Food as Medicine/Medicine as Food)

—-Turmeric has been heavily linked to anti-cancer, liver detoxification, helping inflammation in joints, anti-oxidant, treatment for Alzheimer’s, takes heavy metals out of your brain, soothes eczema/itching, prevents type 2 diabetes, battles depression and promotes cognitive health.  And it’s delicious as well.  Need I say more?  Eat your daily turmeric.  About 1 to 2 tablespoons a day.

10/15…..Seniors Turning to Cannabis for Treatment Over Participating in Polypharmacy (Found in Holistic Health/Plant Teacher Healing)

—-Polypharmacy should be a bad word.  It is estimated that around 90% of adults over the age of 60 are taking at least one medication while about 30% are taking more than five a day!  Polypharmacy puts a person at risk for ADR (adverse drug reactions) which accounts for about one third of hospital visits in the elderly.  You are juggling (unsuccessfully I would support) with your own health if you are participating in polypharmacy.  It is a symptom of the old approach to health and the over prescribed obsession of the pharmaceutical industry.  Stand up for your health and don’t participate in such practices and consider leaning towards holistic approaches in terms of cannabis use for your health.  Cannabis use is a treatment option for various different conditions hence why it is used instead of polypharmacy and taking lots of different pills/medications..  Some of it’s most wide ranging uses include chronic pain relief, a sound night of sleep, and increased appetite loss and it has little to no side effects especially when compared to common pharmaceutical drug prescriptions and especially ADR.  Don’t let industry dictate your health choices.  It is your right to take care of your own health and not participate in the pill popping polypharmacy that isn’t working

9/15…..Video about balancing out your addiction to facebook (Found in Save Me From Technology)

—-Facebook is a tricky balancing act and many will not have the education, will, or insight to know how to balance it out. I don’t think the overall solution is in just deleting your facebook account. That doesn’t seem like a realistic solution that most people are going to partake in or one that people can actually stick to. It’d be like saying just stop eating sugar. Even though it’s enormously healthy to partake in this practice and sounds really easy to do people are going to have a hard time going cold turkey and how does one create a sustainable lifestyle approach vs that of a diet approach? There’s a lot of connecting that goes on with facbook and one should always make sure the emphasis on real connection takes precedent over cyber connection and to be vigilant to fight the temptations to be withdrawn into that cyber world because it will always be easier to do so. Reminds me of the essence of therapy in general. Without being vigilant in our lives towards self improvement and opening connections, the default day to day will lead most of us to a more enclosed, set world of just using the select few neural pathways that our brains need and our comfortable in. Our brains have a tendency to really be naturally lazy.

9/15…..Video about benefits of an Anti-Cruelty World Vs a Vegan world (Found in Vegan Good Times / Environmentalism)

—-This is the second of two lecture videos at the International Animal Rights Conference of 2015.  What is the most efficient way to spread the message of becoming a Vegan and more importantly how do you get people to participate?  Becoming and sustaining being a Vegan is a means to the end of ending animal cruelty.  We far to often get too intense, too angry, to upset with others and consequently shoot ourselves in the foot for that person taking on eating less animal products.  A whole lot of people who participate in eating less animal products will do more good for lessening animal cruelty vs a few Vegans being Vegan all the time.  Praise and acceptance and connection will always win out in how your message sticks vs that of judgement, anger, or forced messages.  A great video for how Vegans can most adequately conduct themselves for bringing about the most possible positive change (not to mention just a great video to apply to any activist topic).

9/15…..Two Meals a Day is Ideal, But Which Two? (Found in Fasting / Portion Control)

—-Consider eating two meals a day spaced 6-8 hours apart and not eating anything within 3 hours of going to bed. You talk about a Paleo diet, humans spent tens of thousands of years never eating 3 meals a day or having the option for continuous 24 hour grazing. Overeating has astoundingly horrible affects on your body and creates a surge of free radicals (trust me, you don’t want those).  A number of health benefits occur when your body goes through intermittent periods of fasting which include optimizing your lifespan by avoiding degenerative diseases and the likes of diabetes and creating stable blood sugar and insulin levels.  It also results in ideal weight control and less of a grocery bill.  If you are insulin resistant then skipping dinner is an absolute must for you to adequately control your diabetes.

6/15…..The Healthy Nomad (Vegan Catered) (Found in Vegan Good Times/Environmentalism)

—-Basically all that is here is what I’ve learned over the years combined with my nutrition knowledge for how to be a healthy person on the road. The recommendations here basically fills up two grocery bags and include good fats, proteins, and carbs. I’ve come to learn that paper bags usually break and so I’ve moved onto like whole foods type reusable grocery bags. I also find that it is good to have a bag on hand that is an insulated bag/thermal bag to keep things hot or cold (I mostly use it for cold). I’ll use it if I make a salad and then want to drive like 10 hours and not want my salad to go bad. Also, if you’re going to be really ruffing it, get a re-usable bowl of some kind and a closable mug and silverware type pocket knife thingy at REI. Whenever possible try to offset these foods by buying juices, smoothies (try to always keep it more veggie based), and salads whenever you can. I plan my stops on the road with where I can get these. If nothing else Starbucks usually at least has one of these things. It’ll def get a bit old eating a lot of these, especially if you’re on a long trip but just remember that the counter to this is eating whatever you come across on the road which will be guaranteed to make you feel like shit and nutritionally depleted/malnourished, thus making it so you can’t enjoy yourself to the maximum possible level. We all know how easy it is to go that route. Never again!

10/14…..9 Anti-Cancer Foods (Found in Anti-Cancer Foods)

—-This is tough to get out of a doctor.  The 9 foods listed here are flavonoid rich berries (currants, cranberries, hawthorn berries, blueberries, blackberries, raspberries, strawberries), turmeric, cruciferous vegetables (cabbage, cauliflower, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, kale, cress, horseradish, kohlrabi, mustard, radish and turnip), garlic, mushrooms, yogurt (or other foods with probiotics like kambucha, cabbage), spinach, fiber rich foods (whole grains in unpolished rice, beans, seeds, lentils and vegetables), bee propolis.  You’d think every doctor would know diets and nutritional information that can lead to less of a chance with cancer.  Why not base your diet off these foods that have been proven to fight and prevent Cancer.  The only thing I would add to this list is coconut.

10/14…..Away With Medicine and Ailments That Can Be Cured And Prevented Through Eating Well (Found in Food in Medicine/Medicine as Food)

This video represents the most modern science related to nutrition.  Remember G-BOMBS (Greens, Beans, Onions, Mushrooms, Berries, Seeds).  Eat a whole lot of those and you’re doing pretty well!

7/14…..Are We Fatter From Eating Less Fat Foods? (Found in Superfoods/Eating the Right Foods)

—-From 1970 to 2000 we became obsessed with no fat and low fat diets and replaced fat with sugar in foods (increasing our sugar intake by up to 20%) and saw skyrocketed amounts of heart disease, metabolic syndrome, and diabetes.  However, today what we see is us actually eating 20% more fat than we did in 1970 and sugar rates are roughly back to their 1970 consumption levels.  We eat 30% more of grains (particularly white flour) than we did in 1970 and are basically eating more overall which has led to us actually being fatter vs one ingredient that has particularly led to us putting on the pounds.  And also, much like the article below, the quality of foods needs to be taken into consideration.  We are eating more because we are mostly eating nutritionally depleting foods and our brains and bodies are constantly craving more.  We are never satisfied as a result and always hungry.

6/14..…Eating More to Lose Weight (Found in Superfoods/Eating the Right Foods)

—-Calorie Counting while eating highly refined, processed, rapidly digestible, insulin producing, sugary foods works temporarily and never in the long term.  We often have an abundance of calories but they’re in the wrong places.  When we don’t eat nutritionally dense food our brains make us hungry and we temporarily solve the problem by eating more.  However, if the food is nutritionally deficient, and insulin creating, the process will go on and on leading to weight gain and slow metabolism.  Conversely, over consuming nutritionally dense and insulin decreasing foods speeds up metabolism and leads to weight loss.  The reason for all of this is that fat has been taken out of processed foods since the 1970s and replaced with refined carbs which lead to the malnourished problems mentioned here.  The food industry makes enormous profits from this practice as people are always in constant need of more food as their hunger and nutrition is never quenched.  Fats have twice the amount of calories as carbs and low fat diets have proven not to work for weight loss and overall health.  The old paradigm of having will power to calorie count and not eat when you’re hungry has nothing to do with being healthy and losing weight, rather, eating larger amounts of the right kinds of slowly digesting, nutritionally dense foods does.

5/14…..Two Meals A Day Helps Type 2 Diabetes (Found in Diabetes Control)

—-Eating only breakfast and lunch (fewer, yet larger meals) manages type 2 diabetes and decreases blood sugar and leads to weight loss.

3/14…..The benefits of intermittent fasting (Found in Fasting/Portion Control)

—-Benefits seem to include lowered blood pressure, better use of insulin, lowered risk for heart attack, stroke, and diabetes, and of course weight loss.  In animals, the benefits included better motor coordination and cognitive skills and growth of new brain cells and a decrease in the possibility of dementia.  There’s the alternate-day modified fast where every other day you eat only one meal with maybe 30 percent of your normal daily calorie intake and there’s the 5:2 diet, in which you eat a normal diet five days of the week, and only 30 percent of what you would normally eat on the other two days.